Addicts of all kinds, I would argue, will use, or take whatever they can get, to achieve or closely approximate the high or relief they seek. I didn't suffer withdrawal symptoms. I was able to function socially if I couldn't get sex.
Which is why I still have an issue when the term "sex addict" gets thrown at me by a reporter doing a story or a potential date who does a bit of digging on my romantic past. It comes up in a Google search of my name. The elephant in the browser.
"What? You’re a sex addict? Forget it."
As we've seen with the ongoing and robust debate in America about sex addiction, those are two words not easily explained away. There are clinicians who hold that sex addiction is a very real illness – one that requires rehabilitation. Just look at celebrities like David Duchovny, Russell Brand and Charlie Sheen.
So be it. I personally view sex addiction as nonsense. To some of you, we will always be sex addicts; our actions offend your moral sensibilities. Fine. But we're not sick.
Jesse Fink is the author of Laid Bare: One Man's Story of Sex, Love and Other Disorders (Hachette Livre, Australia). He's hoping for a U.S. publisher. Follow him on Twitter at @JesseFink.