A month later the next time came. God really does have a sense of humor. I met the real deal and more by accident. His name was Ridley. Between his voice and its air of certainty and his matter-of-fact way of speaking, my usual guard went down. He was different from Joshua in every way. The things that Joshua wanted to be, could only dream of being, Ridley was in actuality. Ridley was more handsome than Joshua with his dark hair and deep brown eyes. He resembled Colin Farrell minus the wear and tear look that the actor seems to have at times. Joshua had a charming boyish quality but Ridley was a man in the way that Sean Connery is. He was the type of guy you can't imagine ever being a kid. There was that subtle kind of confidence versus Joshua's bravado. While Joshua would insist he didn't lie (major clue that he was a liar), Ridley never said anything like that. It wasn't a statement he needed to say with insistence. As for our conversations, it never dawned on me to go into "Gibbs" mode because Ridley was in full disclosure himself. Acts of honesty beget honesty. He told me right away that he had been married and was already a parent. Divorced men with children are a dealbreaker for me to agree to have a date with. Perhaps it was his "being" again that had me overwrite my own rules without concern. For most it would still matter but for the few, like Ridley, it wouldn't be an issue. I'd rather take honesty and a past that resulted from committment than a lie and life that shows a lack of committed choices as consequence.
As an aside I agree that you can tell alot about a person by the kind of dog breed they have. Not so much with cats and I'm also a cat person. German Shepherds are characterized for their loyalty. It's no wonder they are one of the working breeds trusted to protect their handlers because of their deep loyalty and fierce protectiveness. Their human parents are, for the most part, the same. My loyalty or anyone else's for that fact should never be given lightly. I, for one, reserve mine for people who are straight talkers, upfront, and honest. Joshua will never have it. Joshua did not have a German Shepherd. Clue.
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