Dating After Divorce: How Soon Is Too Soon?

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Dating After Divorce: How Soon Is Too Soon?

Related: 6 Things Women Should Never Do in a Divorce

Moreover, subscribing to Facebook as “Vaguebook” is also not recommended. Posts such as “So over it” or “Remind me never to trust men again” aren’t going to help you recover in the long term. Avoid sharing your pain publicly, as it ultimately only creates ill will, makes friends of both you and your ex uncomfortable, and leaves everyone feeling shocked and helpless.

 

If you feel ready to date, however, get out there! Whether it’s six months post-divorce or two years, there’s no need to call everyone in your social circle and ask if they have anyone to set you up with. We say keep it on the down low and take it easy. Also, consider your underlying motives for putting “the word out” to the general public. If it makes you fiendishly delighted that your ex finds out your “good news,” thereby thinking you have “moved on,” it’s time to re-think your dating readiness. Any sort of delight in his possible pain means you still have some healing and forgiving to do before diving into the dating pool.

In fact, Kim may even be taking a bit of our advice; she has stated that if she does indeed get married again, “The next time, I want to do it on an island with just my friends and family, and that’s it.” Kim, we gotta tell you: we 100 percent agree.

2. Take your time. Kim says of her marriage to Kris Humphries, “I think I fell in love so quickly and wanted that to be my life so badly, but I just didn't take the time to find someone." Taking your time applies to standard dating as well as dating after divorce. Some of the biggest losses you’ll experience in divorce are things like having regular love in your life, a warm body next to you, an activity partner, and someone to rely on.

So while it may seem like Kim is barely heeding her own advice by jumping quickly to a serious relationship with Kanye, she does note that they have known each other for 10 years; perhaps she did, in fact, “take her time.” What’s important to remember is that jumping into anything will not get you any closer to happiness if you forget about your actual needs.

Related: Breaking Up Without Breaking Down