I had a recent experience that accidentally pointed out a powerful truth about the way we operate as people. Understanding this truth makes all the difference between whether your relationships will improve and change for the better, or continue to stay the same and disappoint you.
I re-discovered this truth while I was moving recently (in case you've never moved before, well... moving sucks!). Something that struck me was how hard it was to throw away old crap when I was starting to move out. After about seven hours in, I was ready to throw out anything if it meant I could be done quicker.
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In the same way, sometimes we can hold on to old beliefs and old mindsets that really don't serve us. Some mindsets can even be very destructive to your relationships. Yet, we don't get rid of these old mindsets because:
- The mindsets are what we're used to
- The mindsets served us at one time
- The mindset feels like it "protects" us
- The mindset makes us feel like we "belong" to our circle of peers / friends
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One of the absolute worst, most deadly mindsets for relationships is a mindset of "men vs. women." I've met men who resent women on some level. Maybe they felt cheated by women, maybe they felt rejected by women, maybe they had a few bad experiences and became bitter from it. But I can tell you this: Guys who have something against women fail in relationships. And the same is true for women. (More: How Guys Deal With Breakups)
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