There is an undeniable relationship between our sexuality and the food we eat. And somehow, for millions of Americans, we have lost our way on our search for sexual satisfaction and pleasure somewhere in a big box of chocolate. Food has become a stand in for sex, for countless people.
After all, eating is accessible and provides an immediate rush of pleasure. Eating compulsively can also put us in a kind of trance state and numb us for what we may be really wanting.
This does beg the question: "Why are we substituting food for sex?" Perhaps it is the usual obstacles to sexual pleasure that get in our way: Guilt, Shame, and Fear.
And of course, instead of owning and speaking our desire to ourselves and to our partners, we turn instead to the sensation of a crisp salty pretzel, or lick our way through mountains of ice cream (just this once).
Humans are sensation seekers. Why do you think that Pop Rock candies that explode in your mouth are such a hit?
We crave sensation, pleasure, and something we just can't name as we reach compulsively for the next great snack food. But have you noticed that it never really works? Perhaps for a moment, that initial rush of pleasure and sensation almost hits the mark. And if it doesn't quite do it, we are off and running for something else...maybe this time we will try hot and spicy?
The truth is that what we are really wanting is not going to be found in our refrigerator, and that "Peak Experience" is never anything that we can feel good about in the morning. Instead, those old friends come back and visit anyway: Guilt, Shame, and Fear - and this time it is about what we ate instead of our unfilled sexual desires. Why is that easier for us to swallow?