Dating Expert Julie Spira Reveals Where The Good Men Are Hiding!

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julie spira
YourTango's interview with Julie Spira, the dating expert who helps singles find love online.

2. What is your favorite romantic movie? What about your favorite romantic song?

My favorite romantic movie is Somewhere in Time (1980), starring Christopher Reeve and Jane Seymour. It's still a tearjerker for me, and it shows the power of unconditional love. As a former music radio DJ, I have so many favorite love songs that it's impossible to narrow it down to one. One that warms my heart is "Sentimental Lady" by the late Bob Welch from Fleetwood Mac. When you're in love, music always sounds better. When your heart is breaking, sometimes you just have to turn the radio off.

 

3. Do you believe in love at first sight?

As a hopeful romantic, I absolutely believe in love at first sight. What happens in the following months can change the immediate feelings of lust into a real, deep love — or fizzle out and run its course. On a personal note, I did fall in love at first sight from across a crowded room with a man many years ago. It was a rare and instant connection. Although we went our separate ways, it's important to realize that you can meet the right person at the wrong time — or meet the wrong person at the right time. Finding the right person at the right time does happen for many, so be clear on why you choose to be in a relationship with someone. Never make a decision based on fear. Your romantic shelf life doesn't have an expiration date, so please don't give up hope. My grandfather got remarried at 87, and he sang to his wife every day. Some Startling Stats About Sex & Texting

4. What is a key requirement for someone you're dating/married to?

I believe in the "totem pole" system. If someone's pet or ex is higher on the totem pole than you are, it's just not going to work. We go through different phases in our lives of what's important to us. Finding a meaningful and deep connection with someone with common values is important to me as well. I'm a bit old-fashioned and still love a chivalrous man. Being the best of friends and finding someone who gets you (and vice-versa) is ideal, too, both during and beyond that fantasized beach walk you might dream of.

5. What couple do you most admire? The pair can be from real life, history, fiction, film, etc.

I admire my happily married parents, who have been amazing role models for me. My dad has a huge sense of humor and flirts with waitresses. That's the worst thing he does, so my mom laughs it off, as he lives his life with integrity. My father lets my mother make 90 percent of the decisions in their lives and is happy to be left with the 10 percent he believes really matters. Typically he decides which car and home to buy, and my mother takes care of everything else, including the social calendar. It's worked for them for 60 years. And he still refers to her as his "beautiful bride."