Love

Who Should Be The Priority: Your Husband Or Your Child?

Who Should Be The Priority: Your Husband Or Your Child?

New York, NY (September 5, 2012): A survey of counseling professionals from YourTango.com—the digital leader in love and relationships—offers surprising insights into the romantic relationships of couples with kids. Shockingly, the survey reveals that half of experts polled agree: wives should prioritize their husbands over their kids!

About this finding, one expert polled says, "The husband-wife relationship is a life commitment as is the parent child relationship. However, the parent's responsibility is to raise a child and teach him values and morals and accountability so that the child may then take care of himself when he becomes an adult. Therefore, the husband-wife relationship has priority over the parent-child as long as the children are safe."

Meanwhile, an expert on the other side of the fence asserts frankly, "Husbands can take care of themselves; kids can't."

Almost unanimously, the experts say working parents should share parenting duties equally; only 4% champion working mothers as primary caregivers. Experts Expose Secrets About Co-Parenting Couples

Contrary to common "wisdom," 78% of experts disagree with the assertion that couples without kids are happier than couples with kids. 65% of experts believe two kids make couples happiest; 21% claim one child; 14% say three or four.

Nevertheless, parenting presents undeniable difficulties, and 79% report that couples with kids seek therapy more often than those without.

While challenging in the beginning – having a newborn ranked first in terms of the hardest period on parents – there's reason for hope: 80% agree that couples become happier as their children age. The exception? The bedroom. When it comes to sex, 78% say that couples with kids are most sexually satisfied "before the birth of their first child."

Experts rank parental fighting as most toxic for kids to witness, followed by "parents who disrespect each other."

"Parents who fight aggressively with each other create children who have fear and trauma trapped in their own bodies, leading to profound sexual blocks as adults," comments one expert.

Why do parents fight? Money came in first, followed by parenting/discipline differences. The least common reason? Sex.

For a limited time only, receive a copy of our eBook "Love After Kids" (a $5 value) — yours free when you sign up for YourTango's daily newsletter!

Want to learn more? Tune in now through September 18 for the YourTango Experts intensive event, Love After Kids, featuring all kinds of advice and insights from our experts about the unique challenges of coparenting in the digital age.

More couples advice from YourTango Experts:

"These results will encourage parents—especially new dads," states Andrea Miller, CEO of YourTango. "Men often feel neglected after childbirth, but most can look forward to reaping the joys of parenthood over time."

Additional expert advice for parenting in the digital age:

  • 65% of experts agree that it is never appropriate to spank a child.
  • 56% believe that a parent's best strategy to combat sexting is to "engage in open communication with their kids about the dangers of sexting."

Research methodology: Conducted on SurveyMonkey.com, we polled 104 mental health professionals between May 18 and June 8, 2012.