Subtle Ways to Get a Second Date

Subtle Ways to Get a Second Date

Subtle Ways to Get a Second Date

Ho to get a second date without being too obvious.

By Jessica Smith for Cupid's Pulse

Getting asked out on a first date isn't the hardest part of getting back into the world of relationships, but it's getting a guy to ask you on a second date that takes work. Going into the first rendezvous, you and your date are going to have certain expectations of one another, and if they're let down, the chances of getting a second date are slim. We’ve all driven ourselves crazy waiting for our phones to ring or a text to come through, making us wonder what we did wrong when we had thought everything went great! Guys might seem hard to reel in, but after following these simple and subtle steps from Cupid, they’ll be knocking down your door to get the chance for a second date:

Related: Five Conversations to Avoid on the First Date

1. Don't dress for the Grammys: It's no mystery that guys will be wondering what you have to offer physically, but it's best not to dress too revealingly. Keep your cleavage tucked in so he's staring into your eyes instead of down your shirt, and don’t bother with the extra stress of having to pull down the hem of your dress to keep your hoo-ha from showing. Guys love the girl-next-door look, so keep it simple and wear a cute tank and some jeans that highlight your curves in all the right places.

2. Keep things light: When it comes to conversation, the last things you should mention are your exes or past dates. They're not going to be interested in hearing about other men. Also remember that he didn't take you out to be your therapist, so keep your problems to yourself. By keeping the conversation light and happy, he'll see you as an easygoing kind of girl with whom he enjoys spending time.

3. Get him to talk about himself: Of course, you're going to have to talk about yourself if you want to get to know each other, but it’s never good to do all the talking while he just chimes in occasionally. Ask him questions about himself, and the conversation will easily branch off from there. Learning about him this way is an easy way to see what you have in common and whether you’re compatible.

4. Be your best self: You're going to be nervous and you might say something awkward. That's okay: you're only human. He’s just as nervous as you are and once the ice is broken the date will get easier. Remember that laughter is a quick way to ease tension between strangers, but don't overdo it. Most importantly, be yourself. You can’t make a relationship off of all the right moves and impressive comments if that’s not who you really are. Being yourself should settle your nerves and show him that you're a genuine girl with individual qualities.

5. Don't mention the second date: Girls have had their wedding day planned since they were old enough to forget that boys have cooties, but marriage is usually the last thing on a guy’s list of things to do. If they feel you’re rushing into a relationship, they're as good as gone. A guy won't be afraid to admit that he had a great time, but leave it to him to mention anything about going out again. Even if he was already planning your next encounter, mentioning it before he does he could easily change his mind. In your head, you might think you appear to know what you want, but he might view you as controlling or clingy.

Related: How to Know When It’s Time for the First Kiss

6. Leave a little mystery: On a first date, never take things further than a first kiss. If he invites you to bed after one date, he's not a gentleman and he doesn’t think of you as a serious potential partner. Even worse, if you agree and hook up with him right away, you're likely to become his booty call, which can be detrimental to a woman's self-esteem. By denying him and making him wait, he'll realize you're a classy lady who demands respect, and he’ll be eager to see you again!

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