While it’s entirely true that I’m still learning how to date successfully, and I do make some doozy mistakes all of the time, I also realize that I am making headway on the dating front. I am going on a third date with a guy I met online tonight. There’s another cutie I’m talking to just about every day. And, I’ve morphed into a solid fun friend with another guy I met recently.
This is a huge improvement from when I started Match.com over ten years ago. Remember when my date just wanted me to hang out on his couch with him while he beat off? Yeah, that doesn’t happen anymore. Below are some more subtle examples of what I’m managing to avoid doing (for the most part) when dating online.
1. Use Oldish Photographs
Every six months or so a group of us get together and spend the day taking pictures of each other. There are wardrobe changes, attention to lighting, and the occasional up-do. This helps avoid awkward moments like the one where I met a guy who said, “Yeah, I recognized your picture from when we met eight years ago.”
2. Stroke My Date’s Ego
While it may not be the de facto kiss of death to offer a small compliment to a man who is clearly making an effort, I used to simply gush. Take, for instance, the time I told a guy that I paid the online dating site so that I could contact him—and him alone. Needless to say, I found myself alone not too much later that evening after a few awkward drinks.