We decided to meet for drinks and snacks at Hamburger Mary’s because the beer is cheap, the patio is festive, and it’s always fun to chat up the trannies. It was our first girls’ night out together and seeing that the conversation quickly steered its way to penises, I felt right at home with my new friends.
Diana, a sexy brunette who has a great job and an even better sex life set the tone by saying, “Thumbs down. Seriously. The damn thing tapered at the end.”
Seeing that in all of my years of extensive penis experience I had never seen one like that before I asked, “You mean it got narrower at the head?”
“Yeah. You know when you sharpen a pencil?” Diana raised her eyebrows while I nodded slowly. That’s unfortunate, now isn’t it?
She continued, “And when he climaxed? It was like a little series of hiccups.” She mimicked a choking squirrel and I thought to myself silently, I bet she didn’t plan on fucking a skinny-dicked chipmunk. What was she thinking?
I didn’t even realize that Kelsey was listening when she piped in, “The night we all met I went home with him. He disgusted me for other reasons . . . .”
ME: Wait a minute! I know this guy? He was there the night we ran in to each other in the bathroom?
DIANA: (smirking) Yep. You know Walter. You just got ski passes with him!
ME: Shit! I wasn’t exactly planning on doing him on the slopes, but he is cute. . . .