For example, Scott has told me numerous times that he's never getting married again, even if I drop dead of a heart attack tomorrow. (Knock on wood…) He tells me I'm the love of his life. (Yep, often. I'm a lucky girl.) So when Tokii asked if our partner would want us to get remarried should anything happen to us, I knew right away that the answer was "No way."
Except that wasn't Scott's response. He answered that he would want me to get remarried, because life's too long to be lonely.
I accused him of lying in the quiz (jokingly), but we ended up having a sweet conversation about what would happen if anything tragic ever happened to the other. He told me that while he couldn't imagine his life with anyone but me, he would never want me to go through life alone.
I married Scott because I knew what a deep-down wonderful guy he is (and because I love him more than chocolate peanut butter cups), but the selflessness of this answer knocked my socks off. In the day-to-day grind of schedules and laundry (always the damn laundry), sometimes I forget how deep our commitment is to each other. It's easy to take it for granted.
Tokii encouraged us to have some conversations that not only reminded me of how much I love my husband, they reminded me of why. Which is why, despite my husband's sweet concern for what would happen to me (despite his life insurance policy!)—if he were to die young, I don't think I'd ever be able to remarry, no matter if he's okay with it or not.
He just set the bar too high. And sometimes, in the midst of the beautiful chaos of our lives, I need to stop and remember that.
Have you taken any of the Tokii quizzes yet? Did it reveal anything interesting about your relationship, or remind you of something you'd put in the back of your mind? Take one now—it's free to join and takes just a minute to sign up.