Well it’s that time of year again – whether your lover is delighting you or making you miserable, it’s time to acknowledge your love for him/her. Valentine’s Day is all about lovers. And just like sex itself, this holiday can bring with it a sort of “performance anxiety” – because if you don’t perform to expectations, your lover may not be so happy with you. But with a little advice and the right attitude, you can turn this into a win-win holiday.
Here are some exciting ways to revamp your sex life on Valentine’s Day like never before:
- Honor your lover by writing them a love letter, explaining all the reasons you love him or her. Write about what attracted you in the first place, and why you admire them. You can leave it on their toothbrush or the front seat of their car. This will open both of your hearts a little wider and set a loving tone for later.
- Before making love, spoon consciously. Cradle your partner and concentrate on matching your breath with theirs. Surrender control and let your body adapt to their rhythm. Imagine your body melting into theirs, as if your skin is dissolving and there is no barrier between you. Let your body be consumed by your lover’s body.
- During foreplay, be conscious of the way you are touching your lover’s body, and what this touch is communicating to them. The way you touch actually says more to them then the words you speak. Make love to their face, belly, hands, and back with just your finger tips.
- Open your eyes while you make love. If you are a woman, imagine letting your partner penetrate you with his (or her) eyes. Allow your partner to see into your soul. Or, if you are the one doing the penetrating, then use your gaze to enter your lover’s body through their eyes. Use your gaze to claim your lover.
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About the Author: Dr. Marianne Brandon is a clinical psychologist and Diplomat in sex therapy through AASECT. Dr. Brandon is Director of Wellminds Wellbodies LLC in Annapolis, Maryland.