"Most people are other people. Their thoughts are someone else's opinions, their lives a mimicry, their passions a quotation."
- Oscar Wilde
Hello. I want you to think for a moment about why you want marriage and children and why you think it's important. Meditate on it for a while, and you will realize that you don't really know why. And neither do most people. If you ask most people, they will simply say "because it's an important part of life" but they cannot explain WHY. This is because they were not taught to think about it. They merely assumed that if everyone else believed that, then it must be so.
This is similar to how most Christians cannot explain why they think the Bible is true or is the word of God. They simply assume that because others in their family and Christian subculture believe it and told them so, that it therefore must be true. They do not analyze it, question it, or think critically about it. But as the legendary great philosopher Socrates said, "An unexamined life is not worth living." So let's do that and examine this issue.
I think it helps first to ask yourself why you want marriage and children. There are good and bad reasons for wanting them. Here are examples of both, with comments below each:
Bad reasons for wanting marriage and children
- "Because I need to follow tradition and am under social/family pressure to get married."
Let me give you a slap in the face on this one. Look, just because something is a tradition, doesn't mean it has to be followed. In the ancient Aztec Empire, it was a tradition to sacrifice people to the Gods by slaying them on the altar. Does that mean that it's a good thing? Would you do that too if you were an Aztec? Stop being a mindless automaton.
Moreover, if all you did was follow tradition, how would you be any different than the animals, who also follow the "traditions" programmed in their DNA to eat, survive and reproduce? How would your life be anything special? You'd just be another mindless robot following tradition, with no ambition, aspiration, higher purpose or passion. No great person in history is ever remembered for just following a tradition. What a wasted life. To do something just because it's a "tradition" is to be a programmed automaton, not a thinking human being who acts on logic, reason and rationality.
Finally, just because family and friends are pressuring you into doing something, doesn't make it right or good or the best thing for you. They are merely following their programming and traditions too, rather than acting out of reason or rationality.
- "Because they are an important part of life."