Last November after my second break up in five years, I made the grave mistake of attempting to jump right back into the dating market. Old habits die hard; I have been perpetually in relationships since the age of 16, and I am now 27. That's a long timeframe of codependency, embarassing to admit, but I've grown from the acknowledgement of my mistake. Once I was burned and ditched for his high school flame, I allowed myself to spend a weekend in a self pity party so depressing that I was close to pulling a Joseph Gordon-Levitt in 500 Days of Summer by sulking in a pool of Twinkies & Jack Daniels hoping to find an answer in bad calories and unecessary weight gain. I went through all of the typical rationalizing every woman suffers post dumpage; Why me? Why her? What could I have done better? Why couldn't we have at least slept together one more time? Alright, maybe not the last one (he wasn't that amazing, but you get the idea). Truth is, like everyone else, I'd rather be the the Dumper than the Dumped. It gives you more control over the situation even though both positions make you feel less than stellar.
Without skipping a beat, less than two weeks later I was back on the dating site we met and restarting my quest for Love. A guy living in Seattle caught my eye. His profile made him look like an undiscovered gem as he was a volunteer firefighter, closely bonded with his family, and cute to boot. Mistake #1, I reached out to him. I didn't want to follow the rules back then, I just wanted to grab him while the getting was good! It took days, but he responded soon enough, pleased that I was curious. We did the email dance, a couple phone calls, and eventually met out in a very big public restaurant for a first meeting/date. It was almost too magical; we talked for hours, laying out our lives in full autobiographical detail in laughs and wows, intruiged by one anothers' paths that had led us to that booth sharing a spinach/artichoke dip appetizer and rich foaming brews. Even the waitress when my 'date' took a trip to the bathroom came over and gave me a shocked, "He's cute!". Yeah, I know, I'm at the same table (haha).