Mutha-Luva

When I was a little girl, I dreamed about how I was going to meet the guy of my dreams. Listen up because this one is a doosey. See, I had dreams of being an actress slash singer slash writer slash director slash producer slash president of the screen actor's guild. My husband? He was going to be the star in one of the many many movies I was going to write, direct, produce, and star in. At first, we were going to hate each other, but then we would fall head over heels and marry four months later. All of this was going to happen before the age of 21.

I'm 25 now and while I'm a struggling actress who hasn't done anything since last year, I have yet to meet that special man of mine. But, there's a reason for that. A big reason. A reason that no one knows but me and my Sweetheart.

See, it all started when I was about 20 years old. I was in college and Lord of the Rings had just made it big. I was crushing on Elijah Wood (and the other Hobbits and that gorgeous Elf) and wanted so bad to write fan-fiction. Yes, I was a fan-fiction whore. Don't worry Anne Rice, I never wrote about any of your characters so you can't sue me.

Anyway, I joined the site that was one of the biggest Elijah Wood fan sites in the world. I met a few friends there and we all moved on from writing fiction to RPGing (role playing games). I was new to it but my friend, she helped me register a character. Who did I register? No, not Elijah, he was taken. I registered a someone else and played my heart out. It was less than five minutes later that I met the future love of my life. We played for what seemed like hours. Hours turned into days. And it was killing me to know who this person was. I knew it was a girl but that was all I knew about her. I found out who she was (I was a big fan of her writing on the Elijah fan site) and that was the beginning of the end for me. Less than a week later, we started to talk on the phone and that's when I told her that I was in love with her. Granted I fell in love with her the first time I read her reply to me, but it took a whole week for me to tell her that I was head over heels in love with her.

Our courtship went well until she dropped the bomb on me. She wasn't who she said she was and she had two children.

Here I was listening to all the lies she told me and the truths to them. It didn't matter that she wasn't who she said she was. It didn't matter that she was 20 years YOUNGER than what she said she was. I was more stunned of what I had turned into.

Ladies and Gentlemen....I had turned into a Mother Lover. 

The whole time I was thinking..."this is freakin' HOT!" Here, I was writing with the person that I was going to spend the rest of my life with. We liked the same things. We hated the same things. We made fun of the same things. We. Were. Perfect. 

And I was a fool in love. Still am actually. We've been going on strong for six years and it's the hardest thing I have ever done. There's no secret to you guys that we're both women. Two grown women acting like puppy love teenagers. She's 20 years older than I am; has two grown children; ex-husband problems; a cat that I'm allergic to; and the biggest heart that I've ever seen.

So, while I am not an actress slash singer slash all those other things and while I haven't met, hated, fell in love with, and married my male co-star....I have found that special someone. A sexy 40-something Mother of two and my soul mate. 

Now, all we need is the bank account of Mr. Donald Trump or Hugh Hefner. Hell, we'd even settle for that Facebook kid.