Blame your parents.
Blaming yourself for your last painful breakup? Don't. It might be your birth order's fault.
A book from psychologist Linda Blair, entitled Birth Order: What Your Position In The Family Really Tells You About Your Character, says that many relationships fail or succeed based on what order both mates were born. And some birth orders are more compatible than others.
Here are the birth orders that attract:
- First-born with last-born: Opposites really do attract. First-borns are nurturers and caretakers, and last-borns often need to be cared for, so this match finds its perfect opposite.
- Only child with last-born: This is a good match because last-borns tend to inspire creativity and freedom in only children.
- Middle child and first-born: If you're with a middle child, you've hit the jackpot. Middle children tend to be able to get along with both first-borns and last-borns. But any pairing still requires that both partners respect who the other is. An overbearing first-born should be on her best behavior around a more docile and malleable middle child.
- Two last-borns: A couple comprised of two last-borns can be a great creative match. But they should be careful of being too impulsive or immature with one another.
- Two middle children: Middle children are a good match because of their combined diplomacy and desire to please, but they should be careful of being too deferential to each other.
- Middle child and last-born: They're a great match because middle children aim to please and will support a last-born's desires to pursue their dreams.
- Middle child with only child: Only children like to take charge and middle children are only too happy to have someone else take the reigns.
But beware! These combinations are dangerous:
- Two first-borns: Conflict is likely if you're highly competitive and both want to be in charge. It can work if you can channel your competitive drives outside of the relationship.
- First-born and only child: Ditto for this pairing, which may exhibit many of the negative characteristics of a first-born match.
- Two only children: This may not be the best match because you're both used to getting what you want.
Of course, any birth order pairing has the potential to succeed — or fail — based on how kind, loving and understanding both partners are. But here's hoping this insight may just help you make better dating decisions in the future.