Study: Delaying Sex Makes For Better Sex, Marriage

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Wedding bands
Brigham Young University researchers say abstaining from sex makes for better marriage.

Oh, no—Selena Gomez, Miley Cyrus and the Jonas Brothers may have made a serious boo-boo when they recently traded in their purity rings for fellow teen star booty! Why's that? Well, supposedly, couples who wait 'til "I do" to do it are "happier with the quality of sex" and enjoy "a stable, happier marriage" than couples who have sex before they take their vows. Or so says a new study in the Journal of Family Psychology.

Researchers had 2,035 married couples participate in an online assessment called "RELATE" and found that people who waited until marriage to jump in the sack:

 

  • rated sexual quality 15% higher than people who had premarital sex
  • rated relationship stability as 22% higher
  • rated satisfaction with their relationships 20% higher

Even if a couple waited a while to have sex, if they had slept together before marriage, period, the benefits were cut in half.

It may be that couples report greater satisfaction and sexual quality if they’ve waited because the extra time gives them longer to learn about each other and develop the skills necessary for good relationships, said the study author, Dean Busby, Ph.D., a professor at Brigham Young University.

If these findings sound like the sunshine, lollipops and marshmallow key to lasting love, wait one minute, because there's a catch. The research was based on a questionnaire conceived and interpreted by experts at Brigham Young University, a Mormon school that preaches conservative values, or in other words, is run by religious folks vehemently opposed to premarital sex. So, while this study may be intriguing to some—not to those of us who would find it unwise to buy or even lease a car without a test drive!—it's crucial to consider the source of the findings.The Church Convinced Me Not To Have Sex

Of course you have to learn how to communicate outside of the bedroom in order to create a successful, satisfying bond. No one celebrates their 50th wedding anniversary one day if their bond is only about being hot and bothered. But most of us want to at least know whether or not we can connect with a partner on a mental, emotional and physical level—with good reason! That's because a sexual bond is central to a well-rounded, solid foundation for love. Without it, you're probably just stumbling into "death do us part" in blind, ignorant bliss. How I Became A Divorced Virgin