I’m fortunate enough to have a good number of “guyfriends.” They’re like girlfriends, but… well, they’re guys. So they put a whole different spin on conversation. We don’t talk about the latest nail polish colors or <yawn> the what can become when talking with women… tiresome topic of children; rather, we talk about the stock market, business ideas, or how their boat is running, the work they’re doing to it, and the next trip they’re gonna take on it.
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We also talk about women.
And “relationships.” (I use that term loosely).
I get to ask them about men and how their minds work. And, they give me the male counterpoint.
Best of all, unlike women, guyfriends do not offer up excuses. When talking about, say, my situation with X, they don’t try to rationalize or offer excuses for behavior.
Some of the guys I hang out with in my town are what I consider the penultimate bachelors. They are mid to late thirties, early forties. They’re nice guys, but might be considered players by some.
Yes, they’ve broken hearts.
So, dear female readers, I feel it my duty to share these tidbits with you, with the hope of unraveling the mystery we all share… men.
1. Guys gossip. They talk about girls, who hooked up, who is dating, who kissed. They talk about which of their friends various girls have dated in the past. They talk about if a girl is nice, or if she’s slutty, and why. They talk about why their friend Bob shouldn’t be dating Susie, why she’s a crazy bitch… you get the idea.
2. Guys don’t want to date a barfly. To this, I immediately said, “ohhhh noooo…” because I tend to go out quite a bit. They assured me I do not fall into the “barfly” category. Though, initially I wasn't convinced.
A “barfly” is a girl who has to be out in the social scene all the time, even when she’s in a relationship. She has to see and be seen, go to 10 different bars a night. She isn’t content sitting home watching a movie with her boyfriend on a Friday night. (Ok, I would totally be content staying in to watch a movie on a Friday night if I had a boyfriend.)
3. Guys watch their phones anticipating texts and phone calls - just like us!!! Can you believe it?? It’s true… my guyfriends admitted to doing this. They want to hear from us as much as we want to hear from them.
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One guyfriend said that when he’s dating a girl, he’ll text her each morning to say “hi” or “good morning” - just to be sweet and let her know he’s thinking of her. If she doesn’t reply in reasonable amount of time, well, this is a red flag because clearly she doesn’t appreciate the effort.
4. Along the same lines of texting, the point was made that it only takes 30 seconds to send a text. No one is ever too busy to not text back… ever. It’s a poor excuse. If a guy is into a chick, he’ll text her. Or call her.