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Waiting for him to pop the question

Waiting for him to pop the question

Contributor
Love, Self

How long should you wait before it's time to discuss marriage? In the fairytales they didn't wait 3 years with growing impatience and the itch for a child to the point that you can't hide your frustrations. No, it was so simple. Usually a few weeks or months later and the guy is so in love he says the magic words 'Will you marry me?" probably before it has probably entered into the woman's head.

Unfortunately, in reality and with this new generation of confused men it's a lot more complicated, or so men make it. A girl usually sets her own goals on when is a good time to get married in a loving, long term relationship whether it be just a few months, a year or 3 years but what happens when the goal posts keep moving?

For the 30 somethings out there, it seems a bigger deal and walking away from a relationship becomes very difficult but staying in a relationship not knowing whether your man is in with both feet can be extremely frustrating. Communication is the key, so they say, so we are forced to discuss the issue, what's holding them back? do they really love you enough? do they want children? This is a very awkward conversation but most of the time at least you can gauge whether you are living in a dream land or make things up in your head that are all wrong.

From this conversation if you are honest with yourself you can get a gut instinct on whether it will ever happen but having read a mountain of self help books it is still at the back of my mind that men lie! Yep, they will say anything in order to keep you with no intention of following through, even when the guy says 'let's go ring shopping' that doesn't mean he is willing to get married.

So, how long do you wait? Do you give an ultimatum or just walk out the door?  It's very easy for someone to tell you to be patient and live in the now but will it eat you up inside and make you into a bitter person?

Every situation is different but if you account for all eventualities, make yourself happy and grow some self esteem the outcome doesn't matter because then you will be strong enough to change direction if need be.
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