My Boyfriend Emptied My Bank Account

Man with dollar bills in hand
Heartbreak, Self

Love blinded her to her boyfriend's duplicitous ways.

Hours after I had tossed him out, I retrieved my mail, baffled to find several envelopes stamped "Past Due" jammed within the J.Crew and Victoria’s Secret catalogs.

The adage "A day late and a dollar short"?  I was 30 days late and $65,000 short. Michael had managed quite the shopping spree in a month and even charged his work’s expenses to me while pocketing the reimbursement checks. He had abused my one active card and opened additional ones using my info.

I scanned the blur of calculations and slammed my fist on the (newly Susan-purchased) dining room table. Gambling website fees. Cash withdrawals. Office furniture for his at-home set-up. Clothes. Groceries. Jewelry.

Diva diamonds: $25,000.

I had bought my own engagement ring without even knowing it.

I asked my parents for my "wedding fund" since that wasn’t going to be used anytime soon, but I’d still need another $30,000 to cover the remaining balance.  My cousin’s friend was a bankruptcy lawyer; he filed my paperwork and accompanied me to my hearing, but not before I handed him his $1,500 fee.  His name was also Michael. Damn. Was every guy named "Michael" trying to get into my wallet?

Hoarding money became a hobby, a goal—an addiction of my own. I saved, scraped and sacrificed and in the four years since, learned how to manage my money and my heart.

A couple of months ago, Michael’s Facebook profile pic was an image of Lance Armstrong’s sunshine-yellow Livestrong bracelet. Perhaps it is in honor of a loved one? Maybe he "has" cancer again. For a minute, I couldn’t help thinking that he’d returned to his duplicitous ways. I tried—and failed—to change and help him, but ultimately I changed and helped myself.

Written by Susan Gernhart for The Frisky.

More on relationships from The Frisky:


Expert advice

Save your breath because you only need two words to make him commit.
Are you REALLY thinking about their happiness?
If you keep finding yourself in heartbreaking, dead end relationships, listen up.
It seems like you can't do anything right.