How Halloween Helped Our Relationship

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couple carving pumpkin
How celebrating Halloween brought us closer as a couple.

I was brought up to believe that Halloween was the Devil's holiday. My parents didn't let us trick-or-treat or go to many parties.The pumpkins we carved had happy faces, and if we went to parties they were hosted at church and we were only allowed to dress as Bible characters. Except for the year when I dressed as Jezebel and ran around pretending to stab all the kids who were dressed as prophets, our celebrations were mild and focused on family. I Was Taught That Dating Is From The Devil

In college, I fell in love with Halloween. It became the holiday when I could be something I'm not: a Rock Star. And I made it a point to party like one, too. But then I got married and celebrating the Devil's holiday lost its luster. Halloween threatened to become just another day, minus the occasional demanding preschool-aged ghost.

My first Halloween with my husband came shortly after we moved to a new state. We weren't invited to any parties and any hopes I had of donning crazy couples costumes were dashed when Dave told me the only person he cared to dress up as was himself or Batman, but mostly himself. I bought candy, some decorations and settled in for a night of Starbursts and door answering, when my husband handed me a spreadsheet. 50 Couples Halloween Costumes

"Here," he said. "I want you to track the number of kids who come to the door each hour and how much candy you give them." I was confused.

My husband is an engineer, and his approach to every problem we face as a couple is to build a spreadsheet. He's made spreadsheets for wedding planning, spreadsheets for home repairs, spreadsheets for time management and now we have multiple spreadsheets for our very organized, but still in-utero, child. At this point in my marriage, I had no idea the spreadsheets that awaited my future. What We Wish We'd Known Before Getting Married

The rest of the night, I spent tracking the candy, the hours and the kids. But while my husband is meticulous about collecting data, I am equally as good at losing it. My data was flawed. I ate more candy than I marked. I ballparked times and guessed numbers of children. Dave did his best to help me stay on target. By the time the night was over, we were both laughing, fudging the numbers and eating the fudge. 

Throughout our marriage, the tradition of the spreadsheet has helped us make the holiday our own. Thanksgiving and Christmas are constant negotiations in family demands and time management, but Halloween is all ours to enjoy. Together we carve pumpkins, play games and fuss over the spreadsheet. The Halloween spreadsheet gives me a chance to better understand my husband and enjoy the lighter side of his mathematical brain. And no matter how crazy my future kids think the Halloween spreadsheet is, I going to make them do it, because this is our family tradition. Keep reading...

What holiday traditions do you share with your family?

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