I came to this not-so-brilliant epiphany while trying to convince one of my sons that he—and his grades, batting average and merit badge count, all of which he works hard at—were just fine as they were, and then I stopped myself short. Mom needed to walk the walk.
It's not that my life is no longer driven by purpose, or that I have forgotten the pleasure of pulling my own strings. I'm just finding my power in a new idea—that I'm good enough. I'm okay and, by the way, maybe you're okay, too. (For those too young to get those references, please don't Google them; you'll just wind up with more self-help books.) And Oprah, I love you but I'm sorry. I'm tired of hearing that my best life is one I have to go out and find, and not the one I've got. Sand-Bagging Your New Year's Resolutions
I'm full of it, of course. Each day, I still strive to be a better parent, worker, friend, citizen. But in my own head, where I hear it loud and clear, I keep a list of what's not in dire need of wholesale improvement: I'm good at my job. I'm resourceful, reliable, trustworthy and kind. I kind of like my hair, my friends, my sense of humor, the way I cook. After 22 years, my husband and I still want to be married to one another. My teenage sons and I can converse. And guess what? I'm a good wife and mother.
In a thousand other ways, I'm a shambles. I choose not to notice, and when I do, I don't linger. Instead, I remember what my former life coach (of course I had one) often said when I whined that nothing was perfect: "So what?" Baby Bytes: No Such Thing As Perfect Parents
Lisa Romeo lives in New Jersey with her husband and two sons, where everything is good enough right now.