The men's site ModernMan.com recently compiled a funny list of "5 Romantic Gestures She'll Hate." Unlike a lot of articles on men's websites that purport to understand women, I actually found this list to be totally accurate. Among the romantic gestures women will actually loathe? Homemade "coupons" good for "backrubs," buying her items she needs (a new vacuum!) rather than wants, and jumbotron proposals. But Modern Man missed several other romantic gestures women actually despise. Here are 15 more. The Frisky: Great Facebook Love Stories
1. Surprising Us With "Sexy" Lingerie: There are so many ways this can go wrong. For starters, lingerie really kind of falls under the umbrella of "gifts for her that are really for him." Look, every gal needs bras and undies, but "sexy" lingerie tends to be impractical, which means we won't get much use out of it. Plus, you're walking into dangerous territory by buying her something that you find sexy, in size terms that are totally foreign to the male brain. In other words, she may think what you've picked out is so grotesque that it reflects badly on your sexual proclivities and she'll be totally offended if you're off on the sizes. What To Do Instead: If you honestly believe that sexy lingerie is a gift that your significant other would appreciate, make a date to go shopping for it together. You can pick out something you both like, she'll know what size she fits into, and, best of all, she can get the seduction started by modeling some of her options for you in the dressing room.
2. Serenading Us In Public: Or ever, really, even in private, unless your singing talent is genuinely to be revered. Proof that very few women would actually like a man to sing to her: on ABC's most schmaltzy show ever, "The Bachelorette" (in which every cheesy romantic stunt is encouraged), Kasey tried to woo Ali by warbling a tune. She was mortified. He looked like a moron. Audiences at home pissed their pants with laughter. It will be even worse for you. What To Do Instead: If you still want to be kind of cheesy (and you have "connections"), take her to see her favorite indie band and then have them dedicate her favorite song to her. For the guy who doesn't have connections, call in and request her favorite song on the radio station you know she listens to every morning on the way to work. The gesture is still sweet and thoughtful—and the song's meaning will still be a message from your heart—but it will be delivered by someone who can actually sing.