5 Tips For Staying "Just Friends" With A Man


girl and a guy together
How to keep men as friends, without benefits.

"Go out with someone who'll treat you nicely," my friend Willy advised. Why the hell not? I'd experienced attraction deepening other times, maybe my soul mate was standing right in front of me. Sadly in this case, this was not so. When I found myself on said date repulsed by his thumbs, I knew I had to get out of there fast. I ended the date early. I still see him around, but the build-up to that date has dissipated—we don't IM or text anymore. I'm OK with that and think he is too. First Date Tips Guys Should Memorize
4. If all else fails, lie.
Oh look, I know it's not the most evolved response, but sometimes the best brush-off is the "accidental" kind. I was consoling a long-distance friend via an IM chat when he stopped talking about feeling sad about his ex- and started talking about how he "got" me. The attention was stroking my ego, and I let it go much farther than it should have. I snapped out of it as soon as he suggested coming to visit. "Oh," I wrote. "I don't think my boyfriend would like that." As far as I'm concerned, it's kosher to tell a little white lie in order to spare a person's feelings.
5. What not to do.
Whatever you do, do not talk about other men in your life. Seems crazy, right? You'd think this would be a turn-off. It generally is for women. Even if we're not interested in a guy, if he blathers on about his conquests, we start to feel, well, somewhat like chopped liver, right? Apparently, with men, any talk of exes, hookups or dates could plant images in his mind and/or entice him to want what he doesn't have. Better to stay mum.
And you, dear reader? What tips do you have for keeping it platonic?

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