Tiger Woods and his wife, Elin, finalized their divorce on Monday after almost six years of marriage, a dozen (and counting) sleazy mistresses, and one highly visible incident with an Escalade and a golf club. ESPN has the papers filed in the Bay County, Florida, Circuit Court, and while they don't disclose the financial details (more on that later), the papers say Tiger (né Eldrick Tont Woods) and Elin will share custody of their two kids and that the marriage "is irretrievably broken." Yeah. No kidding. Tiger Woods' Mistresses To Compete In Pageant
According to TMZ, Elin will walk away from the marriage with around $100 million, and Tiger's total net worth is in the $500-600 million range. The settlement is, according to the source, more than their prenup would have given her. Elin will also receive child support for three-year-old Sam and eighteen-month-old Charlie, and the divorce filing included proof that both Elin and Tiger had taken and passed a state of Florida parenting class. We're suddenly quite entertained by the mental image of both of them diapering Nerf footballs or something. Did Tiger Woods Try To Nail LeAnn Rimes?!
Elin, who reverts to her maiden name with the divorce filing, told her story to People this week, saying, "I've been through hell." So we guess that $100 million doesn't come with a gag order. The divorce papers say Tiger and Elin have been living separately since November, when all this started with some extremely poor driving at the family's home outside Orlando. And then came the army of skanks, led by Celebrity Rehab-er Rachel Uchitel, who said yesterday that she wants Tiger back. Guess she heard he still has half a billion dollars to his name. But will she still love him if he keeps choking on the course? Tiger Woods Seeks Marriage Mulligan At Masters
Via ESPN and TMZ. Photo via Reuters.