The Salahis Are Hoarders, Famewhores

With The Hills off the air and Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag in the middle of a divorce, we feel like we’ve been left with a void. Who could possibly entertain us and keep the tabloid magazines in business with their manufactured, made for reality TV antics as well as Speidi did? Fortunately for us, it looks like we have a contender: The Real Housewives of DC’s Tareq and Michaele Salahi.

The Salahis might be best known for infamously gate-crashing a presidential party - Spencer probably hit himself on the head for not coming up with that one – but they’ve now parlayed their 15 minutes of fame into a 30 minute reality show. Determined to become the Heidi and Spencer of the D.C. Real Housewives, Michaele and Tareq regularly try to hog the cameras and start fights with other cast members. Recalling Spencer Pratt’s public feud with Al Roker, the Salahis have also decided to start a celebrity fight of their own, choosing Whoopi Goldberg as their target after she recently interviewed them on The View.

Like a certain former couple we know, the Salahis are also said to be hoarders and live in filth. According to Star Magazine, a former employee of theirs has come forward and revealed that the floors of Michaele and Tareq’s home were covered with dead bugs and dog hair when she worked for them and that "old food would be sitting on the stove for weeks."

"It was almost like a hoarder’s house, with paper stacked up everywhere," she added. Gross! Spencer Pratt Desperately Stunts For Fame

44-year-old Michaele is also very vain and frail and supposedly never ate any food in front of the assistant. She only "sipped hot chocolate."

"Michaele constantly sprays herself with orange self-tanner, and it gets all over everything, especially her clothes. And since she borrows a lot of her outfits from boutiques and then returns them after she wears them, it creates friction with the store owners…" said the anonymous ex-employee, who, despite only receiving a $10/hour salary, is still owed $800 in back wages. (Maybe Michaele should start her own, trashy clothing line to boost their income and solve that what-to-wear problem?)

Still, despite their attempts to increase their tabloid fame, we’re going to wait until Michaele enlarges her boobs to DDDs and Tareq tries to start his own paparazzi company before we hand them Heidi and Spencer's crazy crown. Heidi Montag & Spencer Pratt: The Saga Continues