Want to date a guy who loves you for who you are? You already know him—he's your best guy friend.
In 1989, we learned from Harry and Sally that maybe "the one" had been standing next to us all along, making us laugh, drying our tears and singing "Surry with the Fringe on Top." Maybe the guy you're meant to be with is not the one you're dating, but the one giving you dating advice. Maybe your last option for a New Year's Eve date is really the best option.
You can spend your whole life looking for the man who loves you for who you truly are, knows about your oddest behaviors (that collection of ceramic pigs, your 90210 obsession, the joy you get out of dancing like a blind monkey) and still accepts you, or you can pick up your phone and call your best guy friend—because he already is that man. It may be weird to start thinking of him in "that way," but it all comes down to two words: shared history. Need more? Here are ten reasons to help push you over the edge.
1. You already know what the other person wants. He knows you've always wanted a big family, and you know he'd like to be married by the time he's 30. Friends have these discussions. There is no fear of the truth, no asking yourself, What if he doesn't want as many kids as I do? Compromise is important in any relationship, and the best way to compromise is by starting with the truth. You'll get closer to what you both want this way.
2. You know each other's dating histories. Chances are you've seen one another in relationships and you've probably even met each other's exes. Since you've already met his past lovers, you'll be a lot less likely to feel insecure about them.
3. You've shared important moments together. If you've known each other long enough, you've been there when family members have gotten married, when babies have been born... through job promotions, puppies and maybe even the purchase of a first home. These events shape us and shape our relationships. There's nothing as good as having a real past with your partner. Can Men And Women Be "Just Friends"?
4. The secrets are all out on the table. That drunken hookup with your friend's ex-boyfriend? He knows about it. The stripper he dated in his early twenties? You're her Facebook friend. These secrets that we would normally be scared to share with a new partner for fear of judgment? Our friends already know. And we're also less likely to care about them when we know they're just one small part of someone's past.
5. The respect is already there. Respect is so vital to a relationship, but sometimes that respect takes time to form. You need to get to know each other, learn one another's values and see each other in action. Respect is no less important to friendships. Wouldn't it be great to start a relationship and already have that respect in place?
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