A couple of weeks ago, my ex-boyfriend, Authentic, texted me out of the clear blue sky and said, "Hey, I'm not sure if you knew already but I got engaged two weeks ago."
I had no clue.
More from YourTango: 6 Myths About Dating A Career-Focused Guy
And, because I'm an emotional cutter, today I decided to log onto my Myspace account (for the first time in forever) and check out the woman he is marrying. Top 10 Facebook Etiquette Rules
I figured there would be a picture or two on his MySpace page. Turns out she has, not one, but TWO Myspace pages and a Facebook with an unprotected album (rookie). So, for a full 45 minutes, I looked at her pictures, read her (amazing) blogs and listened to her music on her page (yes, she sings — something I have *always* wished I could do). From her Facebook page, I saw that he had a Facebook page, too. I thought this ironic because when we were together he HATED Facebook. He always commented on my "living my life on the internet." I told him he was being ridiculous and people only fear what they don't understand. I figured that he would cave and get on it one day, I just thought we would be friends when he did.
We're not….and probably never will be. I'm not going to friend him. I'm sure that's what his fiancee wants to see in his newsfeed "Authentic and Alissa are now friends." I'm not assuming she is the jealous type, but there is no reason for me, his girlfriend of 2+ years to "friend" him on Facebook now…except to be nosy. 5 Dating And Technology Rules You Need To Know
I am nosy, but I am also respectful of their relationship.
By the way, I call him Authentic because that's what he was — an authentic Christian, authentic man and he loved me authentically. I say, jokingly, that he loved me to ruins. I was so cynical and jaded when we got together, it took a lot for him to coax my heart out of it's hiding place. Love is a strong force.
More from YourTango: Weird News: Japanese Photog Invents The Awesomest Girlfriend
Unfortunately, when we broke up (amicably), I realized Authentic was an anomaly and all men do not and would not love me like he did or even try. If I know what love is now, it is because of him. We had our ups and downs and our relationship was far from perfect, but he sure knew how to make a woman feel loved. His fiancee is lucky.
Don't mistake my tone because I am very happy for him. He is an amazing person and will be an incredible husband. Although, I was in love with him back then, I got over that a while ago and harbored no false hope that he and I would reconcile. I'm not like that. I live in reality. What we had is what we had and what we have now is nothing. I made my peace with that long before he dropped that bomb on me through a text. Why Your Ex Should Stay In Your Past