Dear Dr. Romance
Five months ago I started talking to a guy whom I had known at
school many years ago. We are now adults. He is not married, both of us
have never been married. We spent a weekend together just as old
friends. Went walking, beach, dinner, share the same room.
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We talk to each other from time to time but on general issues. We
chat on the phone or online. He had dinner three times at my house. He
is a hard working person. Spends a lot of time at the office. I do want
to have a relationship with him. But I am not sure if I should tell him
how I feel. He knows that I am independant financially and have my own
house...not sure if that may scare him.
He is a very decent and intelligent guy, and at my age I don't think
I would find someone like him easily. But I am afraid if I tell him,
then it would affect our friendship. Any advice would be appreciated.
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Yes, I think you should tell him, but in small bits, not all at
once. Take your time, let the relationship build, and let him know how
much you like spending time with him. Don't be too eager, give him a
little space, make him come after you a little bit. Try reading my
articles, "Guidelines for Successful Dating" and "Guidelines for Relating With Love"
which will help you understand how the relationship is supposed to
develop. Also, you will probably find a lot of what you want to know
in The Unofficial Guide to Dating Again.