Community: Why Marriage Is Not the End of Freedom


Community: Why Marriage Is Not the End of Freedom

This sure doesn't sound like freedom, yet I know many people who have to go through this ritual with the person that they are dating.  Yes, some married couples also make their spouse play 20 questions before they go out.  Over time, most married couples in this situation either outgrow the need to micromanage their spouse's time without them, or they don't stay married very long.  If your partner is insecure or controlling, then you really have no freedom regardless of whether you are single or married.

To Have Trust You Need to Earn Trust-
In defense of those people who micromanage their partner's time away from them, there are some that have good reason to worry.  Some women have already had their partner prove that he is not trustworthy by staying out until all hours, driving home drunk or sometimes even cheating on them when they head out on their own.  It's not surprising that these women want to try to keep tabs on their man, because he has shown that he can't be trusted.  People that are trustworthy, whether married or dating, tend to have more freedom than those that have been dishonest in the past.  Of course, trying to keep tabs on a dishonest partner is never going to make that partner trustworthy, but I can appreciate why these women feel the need to try to rein in their man whenever he is out of their sight. How To Feel Closer To Your Partner

So, on the surface it may seem that people who are single have more freedom than those who are married, but it is usually the people with the least freedom that feel the need to constantly brag about how much freedom they have.  Marriage is only the end of your freedom if you let it become that way, and this can just as easily happen even when you are dating.  Now it's true that once you add children to the mix, freedom and spontaneity will take a hiatus from your life for a while, but that is a separate aspect from the married versus single debate.