The Christian model for a marriage encourages women to be modest, but that doesn't inhibit us from sexual expression with our husbands. In fact, in 1 Corinthians 7:3-5, God says that husbands and wives should not withhold their bodies from each other. Sexual intimacy is a mutually-shared endeavor, where both the husband and wife bear responsibility. And let's not forget, orgasms were designed by God. And orgasms feel really, really good. Odds are that because the clitoris is a bit less predictable than the penis, your husband is going to need your help in understanding what it is going to take to make you climax. This is where sexual confidence can strengthen your marriage. You both need to learn with each other and from each other what arousal looks like for each of you.
Because I submit to my husband, I feel confident in his care and love and this gives me sexual confidence as well. We have a mutual sense of safety and trust that can't help but lead to great sex. I believe God gives good gifts to married couples to be savored and enjoyed, not ignored and treated carelessly. My husband and I do enjoy a tremendously satisfying sex life, because we have grown in our sexual confidence and because we are secure in our roles for our marriage.
Another way that submissiveness outside of bed lends itself well in bed is that my husband and I have grown in our vulnerability. Without a doubt, because I am a submissive wife and my husband "loves me as Christ loved the church," we have really learned to listen to each other with respect. This equips us to be able to say what we like sexually and to really listen to one another. We have a foundation that allows us to be able to say when we make love, "I like it when you (fill in the blank with random exciting sexual details)." It's so reassuring to have that kind of vulnerability that leads to great sex!
All too often, people think that a good Christian wife isn't sexually confident; however, following the traditional plan for marriage that God has outlined in the Bible has given me an immense confidence not only in bed, but in my husband's love and care for me.
What do you think sexual confidence looks like?