June 7, 2010
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I started seeing this guy on my bday (dec 2) and we instantly clicked. The only problem is that he is still married, but they are seperated. They each live on the opposite sides of the US, but she now refuses to get a divorce since she found out we were seein each other. Him and i saw each other on and off till the beginnin of april,which is when we decided to become official. Now the only problem with this is that he is in the army and cant be seen with me. If he is, he can get in alot of trouble since he is still technically married. Granite, alot of his friends and ppl in the company kno about us lol.
Everything with him is great, he is funny, always makes me happy, we have a great sex life, we are always honest with each other, and i can talk to him so easily. Even tho everythin seems amazing there are still a few things that keep me on edge. he never says how much i mean to him, but he tells me im amazing and im his baby girl. He never tells me how he feels but loves to hear how i feel about him. He says he wont ever let himself fall in love, but when i tell him i love him he smiles, kisses me, and says it makes him feel special. He says he loves spending time wit me but he almost nvr txt me first. Even tho he doesnt contact me first, he always wants to see me. Some nights i stay with him at the barracks, and in the morning i wake up to him bringing me breakfast or cigs, or a drink from the store.
When we are together he is always lafing wit me, holding me, kissing me, falling asleep wit me in his arms, he is turned on REALLY easily by me, and sometimes when he is plastered drunk, he will mutter "i love u bby girl" rite b4 he passes out. He is getting transferred to a dif state here in a cpl months and im moving to a state adjacent to his jus 2 wks after he leaves. He told me that he wants me to keep in contact, hopes that i will visit him, and he said that he will be up to my state alot since a few of his army buddies are gettin stationed there.
But why wont he say he loves me sober? or why wont he tell his wife off? why doesnt he ask me to move closer to him? why is it that ppl are tellin me he is jus using me for sex? Ive tried to talk to him about these things and it seems like he has a reason or excuse or he changes the subject. IDK wat to do.
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