No Negging Allowed. What's "negging," you say? Basically, it's one of those pick-up artist techniques that supposedly gives random dudes mystical powers over the ladies. If a man walks up to a woman and promptly insults her, the theory goes, she will be putty in his hands. In addition to this being inherently stupid, it doesn't work, particularly not these days, because now we all know what negging is, and, yo, we ain't haven' it.
We Fell Asleep Halfway Through Paragraph 4 of Your 5-Paragraph Email Essay. It's hard to know what the greatest emailing-on-a-dating-site crime is, but we have to believe that being totally boring is quite possibly the worst. Researching how to get a date online, thinking through your email, and, for the love of God, proofreading it are all well and good, but we are romantics at heart, and we're looking for a spark. If the tone of your email reminds us of a conversation we had the other day with the mechanic, we likely will not be responding.
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Slow Down, Buddy! In a first email we don't want your phone number, personal email address, or chat ID anymore that we want your shoe size, your social security number, or number of cavities. This will result in prompt deletion. Because we get more winks, emails, and what-have-you than men, the fact of the matter is that we're looking for a reason to say no. We gotta filter out the chum somehow, homes. Don't give us fodder.
Too Smarty McSmartyPants. You have a Ph.D. and you are not afraid to use it with your polysyllabic vocabulary! You have multiple graduate degrees and feel the need to remind us of that fact! You are very culturally sophisticated and have figured out how to reference Godard in your opening missive! We're looking to date your heart, not your head. Show us you, and we might send you an email back. Imagine that!
Written by The Frisky