I'm Already Missing Those Motherhood Moments

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Even if we know what's ahead, will we miss these moments any less?

Maybe I'm just preparing myself for what's ahead, or perhaps I'm just the yin to Frank's yang: he's spontaneous and silly and carefree and I'm the planner who worries and tries to see six steps ahead. Yet I don't feel as if I'm missing out on the now just because I find it so easy to spring ahead to then. If anything, I'm often glad that I know just how fleeting it all is, even while it's still unfolding. When It Comes To Parenting, Does One Size Fit All?

I was reminded of this recently when I was sorting through old letters (yes, the hand-written kind!). One was from a friend I met when we were both 14 and sharing chores at a tiny stable where we kept the horses we'd begged our fathers for. We both thought we'd ride together for years. Instead, the stable was sold within months, and we each moved on to different places, though we stayed in touch, even when she married and moved to the next state. Jean had two sons and so did I, but she was a few years ahead of me on the motherhood journey. In one of her letters, written when I had just had my second son, she wrote, about the early days of motherhood, "It goes by in an eye blink." An Empty Nest Forced Us To Be A Couple Again

I recall that when I first read that line—with a toddler and a newborn occupying my every moment, and the notion that the days were one long, tiring drag—I thought she was exaggerating, and that motherhood was the longest slog imaginable. Then I blinked.

I miss those interminable days that flew by, and I miss these days too, when my teenage and preteen sons fight over the remote, need rides everywhere (especially when I have a conference call scheduled) and complain about how much they wish the other would just go away.

I miss it all already.

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