Media outlets can only show the public three minutes per hour of the Tiger Woods press conference that went down earlier this afternoon in Augusta, Georgia, per an agreement with Masters officials.
Smart move, as there was a smattering of soundbites that could be played on loop for the next few days: I meditate religiously again like I used to... When you live a life where you're lying all the time, life is not fun... And the fact I won golf tournaments I think is irrelevant. I'm just trying to put the ball in the hole.
More from YourTango: Kate Middleton Isn't Pregnant! Here's Proof!
Below, all the bits that you would be hearing if it weren't for the semi-gag order:
A sex scandal is just as painful a a busted knee -- only in a different way.
Q. What was tougher -- this or ACL?
TIGER WOODS: I would have to say this emotionally and the ACL physically by far.
To quote his notorious womanizing father...
Q. What does this do to his legacy?
TIGER WOODS: Well, my dad -- it's amazing how he says things that comes back. In order to help people, you have to first learn how to help yourself, that's what he always used to say. I never understood that. When I was in treatment, I wrote that down; I looked at it every day, and learning how to help myself, I can therefore, I can help more people going forward, infinitely more, than I did prior to all this.
Did he want to be caught? He doesn't know.
Q. We've come to know you as a guy who controls things around you pretty tightly... it leads to wonder why you would leave so many loose ends, and is there almost some element of you wanted to get caught?
TIGER WOODS: I don't know. All I know is I acted just terribly, poorly, made just incredibly bad decisions, and decisions that have hurt so many people close to me. That's enough.
On dealing with the difficult things: what they are and how he did it.
Well, probably two things. I think one being -- having to look at myself in a light that I never wanted to look at myself; that was difficult.
How far astray I got from my core fundamentals and the core morals that my mom and dad taught me; and having to break all that down, and as I said in the interview, with all of the denial and rationalization; to cut through that, I had to really take a hard look at myself. And that's what I started finding strength and peace.
And the other is the -- the other difficult part I think over the past few months has just been the constant harassment to my family. My wife and kids being photographed everywhere they go; being badgered, that's tough. That's tough on them, because it's really hard for us to heal and try and get through this as best we can.
Buddhism, Buddhisms and more Buddhism.
More from YourTango: Exclusive! Greer Grammer On Her Famous Dad & Growing Up Grammer
I meditate religiously again like I used to, going back to my roots with my Buddhism with my mom. I need to do these things the way I used to do it. And unfortunately I got away from that, and I just lost that and unfortunately also lost my life in the process.
Awkward questions about Elin and Ambien.