Celebrity Couples That We Wish Were A Joke

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Happy April Fools Day Celebrity Gossip
It may be April Fool's Day but these couples aren't a joke. Sigh.

Life in the celebrity romance lane certainly has been a bit bumpy as of late. What, with all the restraining orders, sex rehab and feminine hygiene products out there — yikes! 10 April Fool's Pranks For Couples

So today, let us pretend that Peaches Geldof has not sunk her heroin-stained mitts into Eli Roth. That Victoria Hopper did not try to kill the already mostly-dead Dennis Hopper. That Michelle "Bombshell McGee" never existed. And that Courtney Love did indeed just make up her relationship with hotelier Andre Balazs. Happy April Fool's Day!

Dennis and Victoria Hopper

Out of all of Dennis Hopper's marriages (there have been five) his to Vicki has been the longest and most tempestuous. Who is to believed? The dying man out of his mind on pain medications? The adult children protecting their inheritance? Or the young Hollywood wife looking out for her own piece of the pie? It's hard to know, but this much is true: What a sad, sad situation over there in the Hopper household. Dennis Hopper's Wife Ensuring He Has A Sad Death

The latest reports have it that a murderous Victoria Hopper was behind Dennis' December visit to the hospital. She "is a threat to all in the home and has already looted millions of [dollars in] property that is not hers," Mr. Hopper's assistant, Emily Davis to TMZ.

Ugh. So sad.

Peaches Geldof and Eli Roth

Is Eli Roth out of his freaking mind? Or is he merely doing research for his next great horror flick? Hmmmm, maybe that's what we should believe. After all, Peaches certainly would make a great character... You know: the young ingenue, somewhat pretty, spoiled, a bit out of touch with reality. The perfect victim.

Anyway, looks like the really are a couple despite everything, and especially despite the leaked pictures of her heroin-fueled, one-night stand at a Scientology center. Oh Eli! What Does Eli Roth See In Peaches Geldof?

Avril Lavigne and Brody Jenner

The April Fool's-worthiness of this rumored couple should be self-evident. Avril Lavigne: From Sk8ter Boi to Billionaires

Jesse James and Michelle Bombshell

If only Michelle Bombshell (and the six other women Jesse has admitted to doing the sex with) were but a cruel joke, a bad dream. Alas, they are not. Sandra knows it, Jesse knows it, we know it, and, of course, the lawyers know it. The Jesse James Saga Never Ends

Courtney Love and Andre Balazs

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