High Society dating advice, bad grammar and text messaging deal breakers from Paul Johnson Calderon.
If you've had the pleasure of checking out the CW's High Society, it's likely you've already got a few preconceived notions about the show's drink-throwing, dandy-about-town Paul Johnson Calderon. The 25-year-old former Paper blogger and writer (who's working on his first novel) is High Society's gay boy answer to Ryan Phillippe's Sebastion Valmont in 1999's Cruel Intentions. A good looking, enfant terrible who cavorts about (and stirs up drama) with a glossy crowd whose social contacts and blood lines run deep into the most exclusive circles in New York City. Socialite Mellon Cleared Over Divorce ‘Plot’
We had the chance to chat with Calderon about why scruffy downtown boys trump uptown bluebloods, his distaste for LOL and why he hates to make the first move. Flirting Mistakes We All Make
Professionally, what are you working on now? I haven't blogged in a while, right now I'm writing a book, which I started in boarding school. It's about coming to New York City, finding love, being broken-hearted, searching for fame, the next party; but it's more of a fictional expose than a memoir.
Speaking of finding love, how has being on the show changed your love life? You know, it's funny you ask that. It's really hard to be gay and find a nice guy. For starters, I'm not a gay that's very promiscuous. I don't fit into that stereotype, so it's hard to date. But since the show, more people are seeing that I'm cute and funny. More people are hitting on me now. Guys and girls, both. Gay Penguins Split Over Homewrecking Female Bird
Really? Girls? Would you be open to dating a girl? (pause) That would be difficult. I have similar dramas that women have in relationships. I think it would be too much of the same thing.
How long was your longest relationship? Almost two and a half years. But I'm young! I still have time.
Do you worry that prospective men will be scared off or intimidated by the show? I would want someone who is confident enough not to be intimiated or turned off by the show. I don't even like to pursue guys. I like being pursued instead of being the pursuer. I like to feel like, "wow this person really likes me."
Where's your favorite place in New York City to go boywatching? Down in the lower east side. Grungy boys who hang outside of Schiller's and Freemans, definitely.
What are you looking for in a man? I try to be open to love in general. But some non-negotiables are a sense of humor, confidence, someone with a presence, definitely not someone quiet, more loud—but not really loud—just someone with personality and inner strength. Sex And Drugs Made Me A Man
What's your biggest turn-off? Bad grammar. If a guy doesn't speak well, if he drops off the "g" in an "ing" word, that's a big turn-off. Using "u" is OK when texting but not LOL. Anyone over the age of 12 who uses LOL has a serious problem. That and I hate bad manners, you don't have to be the most polished, but be polite, hold the door open, simple stuff like that. Well, that is unless you're some sort of rock star or something (laughs).
Any dating tips from a man (who dates men) to the ladies? Always make sure the ball is in your court and don't over-text.