In 1995, when Hugh Grant got oral sex from a prostitute behind his then-supermodel girlfriend's back, no one could understand it. But he was so boyishly cute, we chose to forgive him. A few years later it was President Bill Clinton, whose unthinkable deeds in the White House turned a possibly not-so-dirty girl into the country's worst offender. Yet he too was ultimately given a pass, even with his dubious use of semantics while under oath and before the press.
By the time former New York State Senator Elliot Spitzer took a wrong turn, he had amassed so many enemies we all just wished both he and Ms. Dupree would both disappear, which happened as Hollywood reporters moved on to the inevitable next scandalous story to be exposed.
Now there's no escaping it. There are the public sexts released by one of the girls in Tiger's harem, a shy and sweet southern bachelor who ran off into the sunset with a Hooters hottie and, just last week, America's favorite funny lady Sandra Bullock got Blind Sided by her biker boyfriend, who has a thing for tattoos. It's more than just a matter of infidelity; there is a pattern here that is forcing us to ask the question: why are men drawn to "dirty girls" when they already have a hot, bright and/or successful one at home.
Some blame it on the stress, pressure or loneliness. We at Single Edition have our own opinion based on men who have committed the same acts but who have chosen to remain anonymous for this story.
It's an easy game of predator and prey. The thrill of the chase is a stimulant during the courting stages of any relationship, but those feelings are bound to dissipate once the chase is over. As a result, many turn elsewhere to achieve the same sexual high, and for those in a committed relationship, precision and timing are of the essence. To avoid getting caught, many men learn to sniff out targets who are easy to win over, daring and willing to get the job done, which often leads them to the bad girls who are willing to break social and other rules.
Problems with partners on pedestals. No matter how sexy she may be, a woman cannot be perceived (positively) as a whore in the bedroom if her man only sees her as a cook in the kitchen or the mother of his children. Therein lays the problem, as couples seek to run the full range of emotions and physicality associated with making sweet love to having tawdry sex. When someone is placed on a pedestal, whether by their peers, society or their partner, it can be a mental mind mess for the leading man in their life. In Freudian psychoanalysis, this is the classic Madonna/Whore Complex, and for men who struggle with it, this makes it nearly impossible to get down and dirty with someone they love. In these scenarios, the "bad" or "dirty" girl often makes a cameo appearance, and is only there to satisfy sexual needs in place of a long-term loved one.
Catch me if you can mindset. Some people get off on the thrill of doing acts that are dirty and deceitful simply because they enjoy living on the edge. And as if cheating were not enough, there are certain types of power players whose feelings becomes even more intensified when the objects they desire are ones that have been forbidden. For some, that may be a boss or ex of a best friend, but in many cases it's the girl (or guy) they could not bring home to Mom, which they find the most tempting.
Like attracts like. It's simple: men can be naughty, and want to be with women who can behave the same way that they do. And if she looks like a player and acts like one, then chances are she is one.
Infidelity is not a new phenomenon. The difference today is that more people are getting caught doing it, thanks to Google, Facebook and cell phone/text logs. If you want to date a dirty girl, then do it; just don't be foolish enough to do it behind someone's back. It's a small world, after all, and you never know who's watching. Don't say we didn't warn you!
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