But what if the very notion of marriage as "a meeting of minds" is problematic? Perhaps Dr. Prewitt's life is rich enough without a soul mate. Men who are similarly accomplished will often settle for a wife who is attractive and pleasant, but not an intellectual match. A man doesn't need a partner to validate him, so it doesn't matter if her brains don't measure up to his. Maybe that's why Donald Trump keeps marrying models. He has his ambitions, his social network, golf...he doesn't need much else. Women want their partner to have it all. If Dr. Prewitt were to look for a less significant significant other, might her dating pool widen?
Women might be more amenable to the trophy spouse notion than they even realize. Recent research shows that women value different qualities in men than they think they do. A 2008 Northwestern University study revealed that, although women believed that they chose partners for their earning power, they actually prioritized physical attractiveness over money and ambition. Women are hard-wired to seek out a trophy husband, it seems, though our modern cultural sensibility would have us looking for an entirely different (and perhaps more unrealistic) partner.
Some Type-A women have already discovered the benefits of a trophy partner. Take Cindy Gallop, the internet entrepreneur who famously spoke at the TED Conference about the joys of recreational sex with younger men. She's 50, living in a beautifully decorated apartment in New York City and zigzagging around the globe to further the socially conscious startups about which she is passionate. Look at Demi Moore. Look at Madonna. These are women whose lives are so full they don't have room for equals. They require trophy husbands (or boyfriends) as much as a guy like Trump requires a trophy wife. Work Vs Love: A Man's Case For Putting Work First
The New York Times article concluded: "Ms. Zielinski, the fashion stylist, said her best friend, a man, told her once: 'You are confident, have good credit, own your own business, travel around the world and are self-sufficient. What man is going to want you?' He laughed, but I found that pretty depressing."
What man is going to want her? One who doesn't own his own business, isn't self-sufficient, has no demanding job (possibly no job at all) and would happily gallivant around the world with her. The man who is going to want her is a trophy husband. And, considering that her life is already more complete than she realizes, he might be her ideal match.