What this does is take away whatever resentment he might feel toward the day and keep him from thinking that it's a battle of the sexes showdown.
As to your friends at work, they don't need to know when it happened, just that it did. The morning of the fifteenth, you tell them, "Oh, he took me to Jean Pierre's. Then gave me a backrub. And we made love on and off by candlelight the rest of the evening."
By making Valentine's Day about both of you, you help him want to make it about you. And wouldn't you rather your man show you his feelings because he really feels them, not because it's a day on the calendar that Hallmark decided to call important?