To Text Or Not To Text?

By samantha karlin — Written on Jan 26, 2010

I have had the good fortune to be in Chile for the last ten days on a writing assignment.

A large chunk of those ten days was spent interrogating the male members of my trip about how they relate to women.

One of the following tidbits of information, however simple it may seem, is something that I know alludes many a female.

Women tend to be the nurturing and responsive members of the human species: this applies to text messages as well.

So hear ye, oh members of the responsive female race: Do not respond to any text message received from a guy after 2 am.

Texts like, “Hey, what are you up to?” “Hey, where are you?” “Wanna meet up?” “Wat up girl?” “Hey, how was your night?” etc. etc. are all code for “I want to get into your pants. Now.”

Now I know what you are saying: “But we’re just friends!” “He would never want to hook up with me.” “There’s no way he would think I would ever hook up with him.” “But what if something happened to him and he needs help?”

Yes, he definitely needs help. Turning his phone off, that is.

Humans are innately sexual human beings, and when the werewolves and the bacardi are out, this is even moreso the case.

If you still don’t believe me, my dear female friends, take a look at your text message/call box from your last night out on the town: who did you text after 2?

Enough said.

And just to make things even worse, sometimes these “Let’s hook-up” texts come before the 10:00 news even hits CNN.

With those texts, it’s important to take a close look and see if the text is specific to you or generalizable. Here’s why:
one of the guys on my trip told me that when he wants to “get some,” he will send out the same text message to a number of female contacts. Whoever responds is the winner….or rather, the loser, particularly in his case (just kidding, buddy!).

So with that said, beware of text messages from guys at any hour….I know you want to believe that he likes you, or you’re different, or you’re just friends, but, particularly if you are a friendly, appealing woman, he is testing the waters to see how close it is that he can get to you while doing the least amount of work.

Let him pick up the freaking phone if he really wants to talk to you. It won’t kill him.

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