Pre-2010, all we cared about was whether or not Russell Brand—long-time player—would propose to quasi-sapphic smoocher Katy Perry in the new year. Post-2010, engagement confirmed, we immediately began obsessing over whether or not Perry was secretly preggers. Talk about pressure! Suddenly, we're all a thousand times worse than our moms ("so...when are you going to make me a grandma?").
So where is all this speculation stemming from?
It's all about cryptic tweets, oversized wardrobe choices, and a spontaneous stop into a children's apparel shop. But there are two sides to every story:
1. Katy Perry tweets that 2010 will be "BUMPIN!"
What we've inferred: Bumpin' = Baby Bump!!! Obvs.
What it could actually mean: 2010 will be bumpin'. (See: Awesome. Rock n' roll. Hella cool. Lots of fun. Etc.)
2. Katy Perry sends a tweet to fiance Russell Brand, saying that she heard he'd been "prego-ed."
What we've inferred: Brand has been forced to settle down because he accidentally impregnated his young and impressionable girlfriend.
What it could actually mean: Lord knows. Have you even ever heard the term "prego-ed" before? This Celeb Lover suddenly can't stop thinking about Eggo waffles.
3. Katy Perry tweets her cravings for In-N-Out Burger.
What we've inferred: Pregnancy cravings!
What it could actually mean: Katy Perry is hungry!
4. Katy Perry wears a poncho.
What we've inferred: Katy Perry is being sneaky, and trying to hide her baby bump.
What it could actually mean: Ponchos are both comfortable (like walking around in a Snuggie!) and stylish.
5. Katy Perry and Russell Brand enter a children's clothing store and check out baby booties.
What we've inferred: Katy Perry is succumbing to nesting/mothering urges.
What it could actually mean: Baby booties are effing adorable, and...oh, forget it. Katy Perry is obviously pregnant.