What's the one word you think of when you think of Kelly Osbourne? You must have read our minds we were thinking "chivalrous" too. The daughter of Sharon and Ozzy and sister of Jack learned from an early age that you had to defend your own honor AND that of your friends and family. Perhaps it was Sharon Osbourne emptying her bladder into a booze bottle belonging to Jack's idiot friend, that showed young Kelly Osbourne that the only way to deal with aggression and inanity is by disproportionate retaliation. Sharon Osbourne kept up her assertive style of defending the family's dignity, glory and reputation by nearly tearing the tricky Megan Hauserman's head off on the Charm School reunion show after she referred to Ozzy as Sharon's "braindead husband." Keeping it classy.
And, as Celebutopia notes, Kelly Osbourne took that lesson to heart. The young rocker, as you may know, is engaged to a young fellow named Luke Worrall. He's a model and as a model is both pretty nice-looking and generally offhandedly derided for lack of intellect. So, a gossip columnist for the Daily Mail named Zoe Griffin (yeah no umlaut in her given name, weird), feeling this unfair prejudice against the high cheekbone set, made some crack about Luke Worrall not being familiar with how earthquakes are caused (or possibly not even knowing what they are). If he didn't know how earthquakes are made, he's not in a minority because earthquakes are phenomena that have many causes from plate tectonics to underground explosions to someone telling mother earth a really funny joke. We digress.
So, Luke Worrall was embarrassed by these allegations of idiocy and had to endure ribbing from friends, family and complete strangers. Kelly Osbourne took exception to this shabby treatment of her fiancé and confronted Zoe Griffin at the aptly named London nightclub Punk. Kelly Osbourne started a verbal explanation of why she was upset and, upon not immediately receiving a sincere apology, demanded satisfaction using her hands. After boxing Zoe Griffin upside the face, she probably considered Luke Worrall's honor restored and the issue put to bed. Unfortunately, Zoe Griffin was shocked (and possible appalled) at this roughhousing and informed the local constabulary of the assault and insisted they arrest young Ms. Osbourne, which they did.
Osbourne posted bail and will be back in court come springtime. The lesson, as always, is don't ever f*ck with an Osbourne woman. Also, while the press is free, sometimes that freedom has to be purchased one slap to the face at a time.
Anyone out there ever defend their man's honor with your fists? Also does anyone else love the irony that he'll probably catch more heat for his fiancee having to defend him?