She Caught the Crazy!

My holiday season began with a classic She Caught the Crazy! incident.  I was invited to Connecticut to spend Thanksgiving with my boyfriends family.  His parents had been divorced for some time, and had worked out a way for both of them to enjoy their children on this opening holiday season; two thanksgivings.  We were to spend the afternoon at his mothers, and the evening with his father and his new family.  Thanksgiving tradition in my boyfriends family started off with a morning of playing football.  It was Fairfield vs. Bridgeport and to the victor went the bragging rights for the next year.  Since I would be spending this holiday in a new place, (far from my family, who Im sure were enjoying waffles at that hour of the morning) I had hoped to go to the game and cheer on my beau.  He made it quite clear that no one came to these games and that it was just a fun time for the players.  Even though I insisted, he turned me down and I was left to spend the morning in bed curled up reading gossip magazines. 
             Deciding to brave the day, I plodded down to the kitchen in my pajamas where my boyfriends mother was doing dishes.  On the counter next to her I noticed a recipe for Tofurkey.  Having come from a family of Carnivores, the idea of eating Tofurkey was foreign to me, and it certainly did not inspire feelings of thanksgiving.  I decided I would just have to make the best of it.  After all this was the first man Id truly wanted to spend my life with, and I didnt want to start that life by insulting his family.  Putting my best foot forward I decided to shower and get gorgeous for the festivities.  When I was done, my boyfriend had come home, victorious, and with the news that they had had a record turnout of fans.  Suddenly I felt a sting in my heart and my mind began to shift.  The crazy thoughts began spinning in my head: Record turn out of fans?  I thought no one came to these games.  You said I would be the only one there, sitting all alone on the sidelines; poor, sad little me. Instead, I was laying around in this black hole of a bedroom while you and everyone in town were enjoying a football game in 60 degree sunshine.  I felt hurt, and left out.  I had been invited to a family holiday, but told I couldnt really participate.  I knew that he didnt do it on purpose, but the crazy thoughts kept feeding my insecurity and I could feel the distance between us widen.  I sensed that I was catching the crazy, and decided that I had better curb it since I had a full day of in laws ahead of me. I sat down and did a relaxation technique to center myself.  When I felt calm, I shifted the negative thoughts in my mind to positive ones. My boyfriend loves me and he asked me not to come because he thought I would be sitting alone and bored on the sidelines.  He made this choice because he believed it was in my best interest.  We have a strong and loving relationship, and I know who I am within it.  Next time I will trust my instincts.  I am love. 
I felt whole again, and I was ready to take on Thanksgiving Tofurkey.