I had dinner the other night with my friends Jane and Anne. We were talking about various guys and their issues. Jane said that a guy will tell you exactly what his issue is in the first three weeks of dating. You just have to be willing to listen. It's so true! Anne and I totally agreed.
I once went out with a guy who told me on our first date that he didn’t know what he was doing with his life (my response had been: "Who cares! Me, neither!"). He ended up moving away to coach football at another school. I felt discarded. And it turns out, he would've jumped ship at any second had he gotten the call to play pro.
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If a guy says, "I travel for work. A LOT," he's not reminding you to renew your passport so you can accompany him the next time he has a conference in Beijing. The subtext is: I don't foresee this changing. You will have to adjust to me. If he were really smitten with you, he would try to hide or downplay the fact that he travels, and he will figure out how to compromise when it becomes close to being an issue. A guy who really likes you won't want to scare you off. 4 Breakup Warning Signs
I've heard so many of these warnings. And confessions, too. I used to think I was someone to whom men felt comfortable spilling their secrets. One guy told me on the night I met him that his dad had died a few years before. In fact, two guys have confessed that to me right away, and another guy told me his parents were divorcing, even though I hadn't talked to him in ten years. It's fine if that comes up, but in general I’ve found that it’s something on their mind that's blocking them from being able to put significant amount of energy into dating a woman. Is Fear Preventing You From Finding Love?
Guys know their issue. They're warning you. When you're like, 'That's fine! I'm easy and flexible and understanding and independent!" they consider themselves off the hook when it doesn't work out. He's not just being open or vulnerable with you. He's not just sharing because he cares. He's warning you, and you have to recognize it. Not that you'll run the other way, but just listen for those statements in the early days of dating. 9 Signs You Should Make Him Engagement Chicken
Looking back, what warnings have you heard? Any guys out there wanna refute this little theory?