Community Blog: Why Thin Sex Is Better Than Fat Sex
Having been an active participant in both fat and thin intimacy in the past year, it is very clear to me how much better it is to have sex when both partners are fit, thin, and healthy.
I have felt the need to write this for a while.
Having been an active participant in both fat and thin intimacy in the past year, it is very clear to me how much better it is to have sex when both partners are fit, thin, and healthy. Diary Of A Former Fat Girl: Sex And The Scale
I know it is common for many overweight people to lose their sex drive. That wasn't me. Although our sex life didn't lack in quantity when I was fat, it was certainly very different in terms of quality.
Why Thin is Better Than Fat (from a woman's point of view, of course):
1. Only two things on a woman are really supposed to jiggle and bounce during sex.
2. It's a lot more fun being on top, having your partner looking up at you, and knowing he's absolutely crazy about what he sees.
3. Sex with lights on is a lot more pleasant. (Relates closely to #2, yes.)
10 Things Not To Say To An Overweight Man
4. Changes in position during a session (holy clinical speak) are more spontaneous and effortless.
5. Orgasms are generally more intense. (I have no scientific backing on this, I just write what I know.)
6. When receiving oral pleasure from your partner, it is fun to actually be able to watch your partner's tongue at work.
7. More flexibility just means more fun.
8. Up-against the wall sex, or sex in the shower is actually doable.
9. They don't make naughty schoolgirl costumes in Size 2X. (Was that my outside voice?)
Maybe you have a different perspective (men?) or more to add, but that's my take on this topic.
Remember!
It Is Disrespectful and Unsexy To Willingly Become Unattractive To Your Life Partner
Healthy Americans do come in ALL sizes, it's true, thin may not equal health. Yet, in most events, being within one's ideal weight is healthier.
I meant no offense to BookMama, and honestly, I never insulted anyone, thin or overweight. It's a fact that a large percentage of the U.S. population is either overweight or obese. You're correct, the solution is with kids. We need to teach out kids to be active, not in front of the T.V. or computer screen, or on the cell phone!! This education must start with the parents.
Sadly, many don't have the time, or the finances to prepare healthy meals. Food is expensive, and it takes time to cook. I must admit that I disagree with you in regard to weight loss. It happens every day. People can lose weight is they choose to do so. For example, I grew up with a pair of sisters, both obese. Living in the same household, one lose 80 pounds, the other did not.
They both have the same forms of rejection based on public opinion about beauty and size. You're also correct, I've never been overweight, for this I'm thankful. Yet, as an average size female, I'm in a shrinking minority!! Even the clothing has increased in size for the majority.
Most restaurants "supersize", "jumbo", or give portions that can easily serve 2, yet are marketed for 1. We no longer have a concept of what is a normal serving, and many Americans, fat and non-fat alike, are overeating at every meal. You're also correct that it's difficult.
I overheard a conversation between young men in their 20's one stated he was having trouble finding a sorority girl to have anal sex with. His friend told him to find a "big, sloppy B* *ch" on campus, because "fat is the new fine" and that a fat girl will do almost anything to be with an attractive man. He continued to say "Anal for you brother is only a hot plate, cheap flowers, and 2 stiff drinks away" Did hearing this make me happy, no, it didn't.
Women are always judged by men. Yet, I find that our gender allows for the ridicule. Women have made great advancements in work, education, independence, and sex. We've advanced, men have not. Yet as a gender, we still want men, and many of us will do almost anything to have one. I've seen women try in dangerous ways to loose weight because their fat partners told them to! What about his fat ass? Make him go to the gym and get some muscle tone!
I've heard men state that all they needed was a penis, and they could have any woman!
Ok that guy was totaly a jerk!!! I'm 6'2" and only 137 pounds and honestly I like the way I look I think that I look fine and sure mabey it wouldn't hurt if I put on a little weight but I don't care what anyone else thinks of me as long as I like it and all you people writing these articals are kindof making the bigger people insucure . Once they read this all they can think about Is I need to lose weight , but they shouldn't need to think that people should be okay with the way they look!!!!!!
You know even the statistics that supposedly prove Americans are more overweight aren't exactly what they seem. Also, the BMI index has recently been discredited. (see source here: http://digg.com/d345AY)
And even the assertion that one must be within ones ideal weight comes with a lot of social stigmas and prejudices. What is an "idea weight" anyway? I have a friend who eats healthy, works out more than I do (5x a week for 45min-hour) and she weighs 200lbs. I workout 4x a week 30 mins and I am not a super healthy eater (i'm trying.) I weight 130. So, what is the ideal weight there? Ideal weight is based on health, genetics, environment and a whole host of other factors that we don't even know yet. It is NOT based on how a person looks or whether they have tummy flub.
Too often we look at "overweight" people and think that they are "obese", this isn't true and its a judgement made based on looks and societal prejudices.
We tend to believe that fat = bad health, but I think that's because there are a lot of myths out there.
Researchers argue about this all the time. Fat people are generally people who aren't exercising and/or eat a lot of bad food. So if they have bad health, it could be because they aren't moving or are eating salty fried foods all the time. Fat itself may not be a danger to health. In fact, some fat people have good blood pressure and cholesterol numbers and some thin people have bad ones. There are some diseases where being fat is beneficial, especially if you're not too fat. People who are just a little above the ideal body weight on the charts live a little longer than people who are just below it.
There are doctors out there who say dieting is a failed strategy. 90% of people who go on a diet are 10 pounds FATTER a year later. Some of that is caused by bad dieting strategies, but even the best diets (South Beach) are considered a success if the people who stay with the program (keep dieting forever) weigh 10 pounds less a year later. That is just not enough weight loss to move most people out of the obese category, or even the overweight one.
an interesting piece on how if you're overweight, but not obese, you may be healthy or even healthier-
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/26957675/ns/health-diet_and_nutrition/
and a list of studies finding that you can be fit and fat:
http://obesitymyths.com/myth4.1.htm
Having said all that, if you're overweight, you are at higher risk for problems. Get a physical, check your numbers. Get exercise every day. Even if you only lose 10 pounds, it can make you healthier.
It is wrong to associate thin with healthy. As a society we have justified our discrimination of fat behind the guise of healthy, but I know a lot of "thin" people who are very unhealthy. I also know "fat" people who run half marathons and eat nothing but healthy vegetables and they are still "overweight." And just because you are deemed "overweight" why does that make you unattractive? This is one big faulty premise.
I think only 4 and 8 are real reasons to think that "thin sex" is better.If "fat sex" is bad it's just because the way you feel about yourself.Of course you can't have intense orgasms if all you're thinking about during sex is how fat you are and that your partner doesn't like what he sees!A few extra pounds are not a problem.The real problem is in your head!
THANK YOU!! I can totally understand where you're coming from. I've always been a small woman. As a child and a teenager, I was thin, and I hated myself with a passion. When I got into college, I gained about 15 pounds, and for the first time in my life, I had curves. I was still small, but I had a shape!!
I think that many fail to understand that small, thin, or average women, have problems!! Yes, we get rejected many times for overweight women!! I once had a man tell me that my 5' 5", 128 pound body was to thin to be "arousing" and that I was "repulsive".
We do live in a society where the abundance of food has caused us a national crisis. It's sad, and I commend anyone that's willing to take enough time to care enough to take some responsibility for their own health. It's not easy to lose weight, and it takes time, and major lifestyle changes.
Every person, regardless of size deserves orgasmic pleasure and love. Yet, in all honesty, Healthy is better. Not every person is meant to be a size 6, but there's no need for 25% of the nation's population to be obese!
First of all, the guy who told you were "repulsive" was a jerk. It's sad to hear that no matter what size a woman is, she'll be criticized. The good thing is there are guys who like women of different sizes, so there's sure to be someone for you.
But some of the things you say about overweight people really hit a nerve with me. You've been thin all your life. You've never tried to lose weight. You have no idea what it's like.
Here's what I wish thin people would understand:
Many of the fat people you see have tried to lose weight. They have probably worked at it harder than you ever have.
You can get healthy, but very few people manage to actually lose enough weight to be thin and keep it off. It is very discouraging to work hard to lose weight and still be overweight, but it is what happens a lot. Preventing weight gain and losing weight when you are young is really, really important.
Wow! It's amazing how moralistic people in our society can be about fat. Sex, sure, go ahead and dress like a schoolgirl without thinking about what that means. Tell people they should accept porn. But put on weight? How dare you!
Now you're "disrespectful" because you've "willingly become unattractive to your life partner." Yeah, most people eat chocolate because they want to hurt the people they love. Nobody wants to be attractive or anything.
What about aging? Are you going to get a facelift so your partner doesn't have to look at wrinkles? Breast lifts to fight the force of gravity? What if he confesses he doesn't like the shape of your nipples?
The reality is that our bodies work hard to keep the weight on once we get it. Dieting doesn't work. Getting mad at people isn't going to help. Telling people they look bad is more likely to drive them to the ice cream than help them.
We shouldn't accept modern unhealthy lifestyles. At the same time, we need to accept that when women have babies, they rarely use all the weight afterwards. Each baby = more weight. Accept and love a woman's body for what she did.
Aging also puts on weight. Somewhere around 40, you will put on weight unless you actually eat less and exercise more than before. A small gain as you get older is not unreasonable.
Of course, if you're not moving and you eat lots of fast food, you need to change your habits or die. If you're fat, you need to look at your health habits and get your cholesterol checked. Just don't assume that you're okay if you're thin - sometimes thin people have worse habits and health than fat people.
