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Wacky Childhood Misconceptions About Sex

From bellybutton babies to vagina dentatas, we've all had them.

In country star Loretta Lynn's delightful memoir, Still Woman Enough, she discloses that she didn't know that having babies was caused by having sex until after she was married and pregnant. Lemondrop: How 'Why Women Have Sex' Changes

We hear you, Loretta. After a recent informal survey around the office, we found out that we had some pretty wacky sexual misconceptions growing up. So we asked our friends, co—workers, and Twitter buddies to tell us their most wrong—headed notions about "makin' time." Lemondrop: Things to Say During Sex

Below, check out our roundup of childhood sexual misconceptions, helpfully ranked on a scale of Sexual Confusion. And thank your lucky stars for public school and HBO, because if we hadn't eventually learned about sex, we'd all be pregnant, in prison, or incredibly frustrated by the search for the elusive navel G-spot. Lemondrop: More Childhood Sexual Misconceptions From Our Readers

Misconception: "I thought sex was naked people on top of each other groping and kissing, like in movies. In fifth grade, my brother told me the penis went INSIDE. I was horrified." — Meg, 28

Sexual Confusion Index: 3 out 11.

Misconception: "My babysitter told me you could get AIDS from crying." — Laura, 32.

Sexual Confusion Index: 3.5 out of 6

Misconception: "Penis + bellybutton = baby. I used to think that was the only way to do it, but now I realize that's just my preferred method." — Sarah, 25

Sexual Confusion Index: 2 out of 6

Misconception: "The boyfriend I had when I was 18 still thought that girls only had one 'hole.'" — Gina, 23

Sexual Confusion Index: 4 out of 7

Misconception: "I once asked my grandma, 'Why do they call it blow if you suck?'" — Alexis, 24.

Sexual Confusion Index: 2 out of 11

Misconception: "I thought a girl got pregnant when a guy peed in her." — Erin, 26.

Sexual Confusion Index: 3 out of 6

Misconception: "I had no concept of a penis. I thought men had three balls and that's it. I'm glad I was wrong." — Diana, 24.

Sexual Confusion Index: 5 out of 6

Misconception: "My parents gave me the 'Where Did I Come From?' book when I was really young. So from the illustrations I thought babies were made by two hippies." — Maggie, 28

Sexual Confusion Index: 2 out of 7

Misconception: "I used to think that sex was for two people who really loved each other." — Molly, 23

Sexual Confusion Index: 7 out of 7

Can you relate?

Discussion

bogart4017 Married
Can Relate - Posted October 20, 2009

As a kid i thought sex was rubbing up and down until tweo people got tired and went to sleep!

Score: 1

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BookMama Married Happily Married
Posted October 6, 2009

I basically think that sex is for two people who really love each other.

Score: 0
Airen Married polyamorous, committed, intimate, free
Posted October 6, 2009

I love the "kinda like pancakes" line! Would make it all so much easier than the whole nine month thing LOL (I'm 7 months right now and MAN would it be so much easier if I could just use a nice large mixing bowl and bake the baby!)

I thought childbirth only took 15 minutes...that's how long it is in those shows on PBS when I was a kid. A bit of grunting, maybe a high pitched wail and voila baby! No blood, no stretching of the vagina, no mess! Came as a shock later when I witnessed my cat giving birth and my Mom explained that there isn't much difference in the whole process for humans. I informed her I would rather go outside and play....

Score: 1
Lyz Married Community Manager
Posted October 6, 2009

Okay I thought that prostitutes LITERALLY sold their bodies for $$. And I thought you could get pregnant from hot tubs. Whoever thought of the hot tub myth needs to be shot at dawn.

Score: 0
BookMama Married Happily Married
Posted October 6, 2009

I like this from WikiAnswers - Yes, you can get pregnant if you have sex in a hot tub.

Score: 0
Tom Single
Posted October 6, 2009

That happened on Glee, Liz. And no one is the wiser.

Score: 0
Lyz Married Community Manager
Posted October 7, 2009

I knew there was a reason I hated that show.

Score: 0

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