In Defense Of Ex Sex

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In Defense Of Ex Sex
Having sex with your ex-husband: good idea? One woman tells her ex sex story.

He insisted on walking me to the next bar. I was grateful for the lingering June light as we dawdled in front and shared a long goodbye embrace; there were no shadows or dark corners to get lost in. I savored his closeness, but then remembered myself and quickly took my leave. Inside, I found my friends and made my way over to them in the dimness. They were suspicious of my buoyant mood (they'd been expecting tears, venom, the usual), but were cautiously happy for me when I told them how well things had gone. Someone handed me a beer. Someone else started telling me about her new boyfriend. Soon I was wholly caught up in the social whirlwind, and was on my next drink by the time I noticed I had a new text message. That was such a nice talk. Thank you. Nerve: Is 29 Old Enough To Be A Cougar?

I smiled, then checked to see if anyone was watching. They were not. I decided to test the boundaries. I'm gonna admit this to you in the spirit of honesty. I seriously thought about trying to have breakup sex with you, but it seemed way too self-destructive.

 

He texted back immediately. Yeah I thought about it too. You're looking good these days. But I agree. Too much attached. 

So he had thought about it. And he thought I looked good. I was flush with success. More time passed. More pitchers were consumed. More people came. The party moved to a dive bar down the street. It was after midnight when my phone buzzed again. In the spirit of honesty... how averse to being self-destructive are you?

Ohmygod.

I made a beeline for the grimy two-stall bathroom, checked to make sure I was alone, and then stared at myself in the mirror. The florescent overhead light should have washed me out, but there was color in my cheeks, fire in my eyes. I looked my reflection straight in the eye. "Anna. Don't do this. There will be consequences." (Bathroom-mirror pep talks are common for me when I've been drinking.) My reflection didn't flinch. Intellectually, I understood that the decision I was about to make was a bad one, but I was tired of fighting the past, tired of inoculating myself against life. I locked myself in a stall and waved the white flag. Not that averse. Give me a few hours.

 
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