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A Lesbian's Response To Gay Pride: Shame On Them

A lesbian single mother's response to "g-string strutting, crotch-grabbing" gay activists.

Posted: Wednesday September 16th, 2009 at 08:40 PM

Let's open with a disclaimer, so that when the gay "community" fires back at me with an indignant spank, they will recognize that I am family, and that my opinion does not come from the outside looking in. Not that they will be any more tolerant of my criticism because of it but, in the very least, they will know that I am on the same team and speak for many others like me who are sitting on the bench watching the parade go by.

I am a lesbian and the single mother of a teenage daughter. I am open about my sexuality to select friends, though would not, for one moment, hang my head if outed. I offer no apologies for protecting my anonymity at this stage in my life and I will come out entirely on my own terms. I have raised my daughter in a very liberal, civic and open minded home, and received nothing but her support when I came out to her. She has many gay, bi, and lesbian friends who all find refuge in our hearts and our home when needed and, as a straight teen, my daughter actively supports gay issues. For this I am proud. She is my most rewarding contribution towards helping to create a society we can all thrive in equally. This Just In: Nothing Can Turn You Gay

This weekend she asked me to attend Pride with her, which I promptly declined, though I gave her my permission to attend with her friends. She asked if the reason for my decision was that I was ashamed of being a lesbian—which I explained could not be further from the truth. I expressed my opinion, and she respected it.

I explained, "I don't feel as though Pride depicts an accurate or favorable image of gay individuals. For this reason, among plenty of others, I feel there are too many of us who are still hiding in lower, upper and middle class closets, afraid to come out of the dark due to fear of the reflection on the other side. The image I am referring to is that of the g-string strutting, lip-locking, crotch grabbing, ass slapping, sex toy yielding, sexually preoccupied exhibitionists notoriously parading around at Pride events. This is not the image I want to wave on a flag to get the public's attention, nor is it a way of earning the respect we are entitled to. Is America Ready For Gays To Be Equal?

Imagine if Martin Luther King had taken such liberties while marching for the rights of black America. Absurd, right? So why does the gay community make a spectacle out of us? Is it not an oxymoron to scream, "We are just like you!"—while drawing a line in the sand with such adversarial behavior? How is the prejudice public ever going to relate to the gay community when many of us who are actually gay can not do the same? Why does being gay have to be depicted with overtly sexualized themes and behavior? Let's add this to my disclaimer: "I am not sexually inhibited nor am I a conservative prude, but I do believe that there is a place and time for everything, and sexual exhibitionism does not belong in the streets, in our collective theme, message—or in our quest for equality." 9 Signs He's Gay

Can you relate?

Discussion

Voli23 Single open heart open mind
Can't Relate - Posted September 24, 2009

Very well written and a joy to read!

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KatyInLasVegas Taken Amazing, Sexy, Passionate
Posted September 23, 2009

I'm so right there with you. When I was younger, going to Pride was a statement but the older I get the more I feel the exact same way you do. Gay and lesbian friends have commented many times that I should take my daughter (a 4 yr old) to Pride so that she understands what it means to be part of this "community" even if she's straight. Problem is, there is no community, it's just sex and it's certainly not the way I'd want to teach her to stand up and be heard! Thank you for writing this and know you are not alone -- from one lesbian Mom to another.

Score: 0
Isis Complicated
Posted September 17, 2009

I hope you write more articles in the future! I would love to read them!

Score: 0
Lyz Married Community Manager
Posted September 17, 2009

Loved this! Thank you so much.

Score: 0
Isis Complicated
Can Relate - Posted September 16, 2009

LF--You are so on the money! Great article! I appreciate someone with such clarity and vision writing this article! You have great voice! Are you free Friday night?

Score: 1

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