How to maintain friendships when starting a new relationship.
As a single friend migrates into serious couple-dom, there is always a period during which relations with existing friends can take a turn for the worse. Everyone has had that friend who falls off the face of the Earth once she's roped into a new relationship. There's also the girlfriend who won't stop talking about her newfound love at the expense of everyone else's interest. Read: My Friends Don't Get My Relationship
Face it, dynamics between friends can change at the drop of dime when a new man gets involved. Perhaps you, too, have been a perpetrator of such an unseemingly act. The beauty of having "your girls" is that they should outlast any relationship—unless you push them away, of course. Here are five things to solemnly swear amongst your gal pals never to do. Sign on the dotted line and notarize it—lest you fancy the idea of being having no support system after a potential breakup.
1. I won't force you to go on some awkward double date with one of his guy friends. Couples like to chat about their single friends—the drama of single life often being juicier than a reality dating show. Inevitability, a conversation will one day crop up where the happy couple will want to play matchmaker. A "totally casual" meet-and-greet will be set up between the four of you, and "totally casual" will turn out to mean the two "friends" sitting sullenly side-by-side at the dinner table, watching the lovebirds feed each other and do other cheesy couple things. Read: The Genius Of The Double Date
2. I won't get mad at you if you don't like him. Sometimes, your new guy is just not your girlfriends' cup of tea. Their distaste might be justified (he's repeatedly hurt you) or not (he looks like a GEICO caveman). Whatever the reason, the worst thing you can do for the friendship is fight about it. Even if you disagree, treat your friends' opinions respectfully. They may be seeing something you've turned a love-blind eye to. Read: My Friends Hate My Boyfriend!
3. I won't brag about my sex life, especially if you're single. Sure, dish out the juicy details when asked for them, but please keep some form of humility on you at all times. We're looking at you, Speidi.
4. I won't ask you to cover up for my cheating. Asking a friend to be your "cover story" when in high school and wanting to sneak out to see a boyfriend is one thing, but come now, we're all adults now. If a marriage is involved, don't expect your friends to help you cover up an affair.
5. I won't cancel on our planned dates. This is pretty obvious, but nonetheless one of the major reasons friendships fall apart after one party gets paired off. Friends can't expect their newly-paired compadres to have the same amount of time for them as they used to, we get that. It's one thing to make minor adjustments like planning girls' nights out around a couples' night in, it's another to chronically cancel at the last minute just because couple-time suddenly came up. Do this often enough and you'll be on a one-way train to Friendless-ville.